Welcome To Online Storm !

On hold

2010-05-02T19:52:00.002+01:00

I'm back!

Another update on me (boring, I know)..Still struggling to come to terms with my diagnoses of MS. Will I ever get my head around it? Hopefully.

Life seems to be on hold for now. No working. No moving on to getting a full time job. One good thing. Got my holiday in Cyprus coming up. 2 weeks in the sun will hopefully do me the world of good. Heading there at the end of July. Might not come home!

This seems like a really crap post. As I'm typing it I'm thinking "WTF? STOP AND FIND SOMETHING ELSE TO SAY!" but I can't help but continue to type utter rubbish. I guess I'll just go find something else to do. Could even think of other posts to make. I could even watch some Supernatural and Vampire Diaries. Which has given me an idea.

I shall return!

Had a bad time

2010-04-15T22:45:00.003+01:00

It's been awhile again. I know. Had a rough few weeks...well, months really.

About 3 months ago I started having a wee bit of a bad time. Bad sight in my right eye, dizzy 24/7, people thinking I'm drunk 24/7 because I couldn't walk in a straight line, weird feeling in my legs..So I went to see the doctor. I was in 5 minutes and he said he would refer me to the hospital. I had to go back a few days later to have blood taken.

After an very early start that morning, I headed back home after walking around town with my Gran. My eye felt weird. So I checked it in the mirror. One eye was really small and my left eye was HUGE. The left side of my lip was also droopy and numb. I called the doctors and they asked me to come straight up before they shut for the night.

2 hours later I was in the doctors room and she looked a little worried. After another 15 minutes waiting for her to make some calls, she told me I needed to head straight up to the hospital to the Neurology ward.

After a week of sitting about, having an MRI scan, and a lumber puncture done, my specialist came to see me to tell me I have MS (Multiple Sclerosis). He told me I most likely have Relapsing Remitting MS because they think my first episode was over 10 years ago when I lost the sight in my right eye.

I sit here with the struggle of getting by every day with no car (it broke down before christmas), trying to get use to not being able to walk all that great unless I have a crutch, trying to come to terms with the withdrawl of a good job offer I was just about to have (although I'll still be offered it when I'm a bit better) and trying to get my head around the fact I have MS.

Still not read my booklet, looked at any websites and hardly talk about it. Still not ready. I will have to soon. Need to understand what's going on and what will happen about my holiday that I'm having in July. It'll hit me. How hard, or how soon, I don't know. Got to keep smiling for now. It's the only way I can get by day by day.

4th December 09

2009-12-07T00:05:00.002Z

I know I haven't written for a while but I've been ultra busy and to be honest, I haven't really wanted to write. So I guess I better pull my finger outta my arse and get motivated.

I ended up putting on 2kg during the mushy stage, I've lost it again just by going onto normal food (early, but I'm not telling the doctor that!) and going back to 3 meals a day. So, I'm back down to 92.5kg. I do feel better, probably because I'm not full of food.

My only problem is, now that the band has healed and the swelling has gone down, it's like I have no restriction whatsoever. I've overeaten so I just hope to Christ I haven't stretched the stomach pouch. I don't think I have, but who knows. I've just got to get my head around eating less. Sometimes I can do it no problem, but sometimes I feel I could eat until I explode. I know it's all in my head but that's my problem. I just can't stop myself. It's like I have a little monster in m y head that keeps pestering me and it won't let up until I satisfy its demands. After that, there's another little monster that berates me to no end because I've let that food monster win. And I feel disgusted with myself.

That's why I really want a fill when I go to see Dr Dolan on Tuesday.l I'm worried that he won't because my port wound still hasn't healed. It's getting better, the nurse is extremely happy with the progress. But knowing my luck he'll refuse to give me a fill until it fully heals. Not happy, Jan.

21st November 09 Day 15

2009-11-21T14:29:00.002Z

Today was a pretty good day. The head hunger seems to have disappeared. I ate pretty well, the chicken stew was great. Yesterday was a complete fuck up. I ended up eating all of the fish cake mush, about 1 cup full in total. I paid for it afterwards. I was in agony. I felt worse than if I'd eaten more than I usually do when we go to Sizzler. I know I shouldn't have done it, but that's what I was like before the band. I'd eat and suffer the consequences later. Can't do that anymore! I'm looking at it as a positive thing. It just goes to show that I have no choice, I have to change my eating habits or else.

The antibiotics have kicked in. Talk about windy around here! I keep blaming the poor dog. I swear though, prune juice DOES NOT WORK!!! I've been having 1/2 a glass a day and the only way I've been able to "drop a few friends off at the pool" is to take doses of Dad's Actilax.

I know I'll probably say this many times in the future, so here goes the first. Even though I've had to endure a very sore bottom, an infection in the wound, 2 weeks of runny food then 2 weeks of baby food, unbearable back pain, I'd do it again in a heartbeat. In only 2 weeks I'm feeling better than I have in forever. Sometimes I still can't believe I've actually taken that huge step to have the banding done. Me, the ultimate lazybones!

Well, I'm off for my last "meal" of the day. A gorgeous white hot chocolate (99% fat free!!) YUM. Nighty night!!

20th November 09 Day 14

2009-11-21T14:02:00.002Z

Weigh-In. Last week 94,5kg. This week 93.5kg. Loss 1kg

Well, I'm finally on the "mushies" stage. It's not too bad, I made some fish cakes last night, mushied it up with some gravy, it was delicious. Made a nice chicken and barley stew in the slow cooker today, I'll blitz it nice and smooth. I've got enough food for a few days at least. I miss the Sustagen for breakfast, that stuff was lovely. Half a weetbix just doesn't cut it. I'm finding it hard dealing with the "head hunger". I seem to want to eat all the time. I count down the minutes until I can eat again. I'm being strong though, as much as I could sneak in spoons of food between meals, I'm not. I'm behaving myself and not succumbing to temptation. It's not easy though.

My port wound is still infected. Went to see the GP again today, he took a swab of the gooey bit and sent it off for analysis. So I'm back on antibiotics and the wound is packed and dressed. I go back on Monday to see the nurse and have the dressing changed. I know it's because of the diabetes that the wound is taking so long to heal. I just hope it heals enough so I can have my band filled and I can get over this hungry phase.

The back pain is nearly totally gone, thank fuck. It still hurts sometimes but I think it's because I've been unable to sleep on my stomach.

I suppose 1kg is a better loss than nothing. I realise that some people put weight on during the mushies stage. So I'm preparing myself for that. I'm not too worried, once I get a fill I should start dropping weight again.

Originally written on 13th November 2009

2009-11-15T01:05:00.003Z

Weigh-in. 94.5kg. Loss - 5.5kg

Friday the 13th! It's been a week since my op. I'm doing a lot better now than I have been. Saturday was fine, I spent most of the day resting but I kept getting up to walk around a bit. Mainly to stop the DVT but also to get rid of the gas from the op. The rest of the week has gone so quickly. I'm actually coping really well with the liquid diet. I found some really nice recipes on the banding forum Jo showed me a while ago. I've been having pureed baked beans mixed with tomato soup. Delicious! I put a bit of paprika, chilli powder and curry powder in it too, it ends up tasting like mexican salsa. I made a cauliflower, broccoli and brie soup last night too. It was okay, not as nice as the beans though. So this is my daily menu (roughly).
Meal 1. 175ml Sustagen hospital formula
Meal 2. Petit Miam made thin with milk OR pureed fruit with apple juice
Meal 3. Soup
Meal 4. Depends if I feel hungry, if I do I'll have some V-8 juice
Meal 5. Soup or egg-flip
Meal 6. Jarrah Choc-O-Lait (before bed)
Plus I'm trying to get as much water/diet cordial in as I can but sometimes it's hard to get a litre a day in. Oh well, I guess it'll improve as time goes by. I can't wait for the "mushies" fortnight, mashed potato and gravy here I come!

I'm not really missing any foods except pasta. I made Dad spinach pie on Tuesday. I could have quite happily murdered for a slice. I just had to keep reminding myself this liquid stage won't last long and I'll be able to eat relatively normally soon, albeit not all the fattening stuff I was eating before. At the moment they're not too worried about what I eat, as long as it can be pureed and thinned down enough so it can be eaten through a straw. Not that I actually eat it through a straw! But I'm not being silly about it. I'm getting in a fair bit of protein and only a small amount of fats and sugars. So I think I'm doing quite well, all things considered.

I'm still in a fair amount of pain in my back. Hot packs and morphine relieve it some of the time. It feels like something is stuck in there. Like I've swallowed a brick and it's stuck in the pipes. If it doesn't get better by Tuesday or Wednesday I'll ring Dr D and see what he says. The abdominal pain is nearly totally gone, so I can finally sleep on my left side. The only thing is, I've got a low grade infection in one of the cuts. Not to worry though, I went to the GP today and he's put me on antibiotics (liquid, yay!) and I'm putting Betadine ointment on 4 times a day. My stomach still resembles a Canadian sunset though. I've never seen so many different shades of bruising!

Well, I think it's time for another hot pack and a white hot choc. I really can't be arsed doing anything tonight so I think I'll just veg in front of the idiot box. HP-Goblet of Fire is on, or maybe I'll shove on a MH disc. Ciao!

Originally written on 7th November 2009

2009-11-15T00:55:00.002Z

It's 7am, the morning after my surgery. I feel good, except for the pain between my shoulder blades apparently caused by "gas" (not farts!!!) and being really thirsty! Can't even have the tiniest sip of water until the x-rays come back with the all clear. Hopefully that won't be too long. The nurses are aiming for a 12-1pm discharge but they get so busy, bless 'em. It might be later than that.

My surgeon was great. He really put me at ease. Not bad looking, either! Haha! I felt sorry for the poor girls in recovery though, I'm not very nice when I come off the anaesthetic. I did apologise profusely though. Afterwards, thinking about it, I reminded myself acting the way Dad was when he was so sick in April. I guess I am his daughter after all!

I had to have one of those thingys on my finger to test my oxygen levels, not to mention the nasal prongs. At least they're better than the mask! I'm on a saline drip, that'll probably last until I go for the x-rays. Same with the TEDS stockings and the inflatable leg pump thingys that are supposed to stop blood clots. They're not so bad. Feels like a leg massage. I wish I could rip the plasters off and have a bloody good scratch!

The day nurse just came in. She'll change the dressings then take out the drip so I can have a shower. Woohoo! Things are starting to roll!

I've got two room mates. One is a British lady who seems nice but the poor thing can't seem to handle her medications. She's been sleeping a lot, I think they're giving her calmatives. The other lady is probably all of 18, she's sweet but she doesn't look like she needs the band. She's about half my size! Oh well, I don't know her or her situation so I can't comment or judge her.

God, Saturday morning TV sucks!

Gotta go, nursey's here. BBL!!!

Originally written on 24th October 2009

2009-11-15T00:37:00.003Z

It's 3 days into my 2 weeks of Optifast. 12 days until my operation. I can't believe how quick the time has passed. I'm finding it easy during the day on the shakes, but after dinner is proving to be extremely difficult. I seem to be hungrier after dinner for some reason. It's probably not actually hunger, more like boredom, habit as well. I'd take Sandra's advice and sleep, but Dexter's on at 11pm and I can't miss that. So instead I'm watching Iron Chef. Glutton for punishment? Probably.

Today Dad wanted Red Rooster for lunch. Driving home with the smell of hot chicken and chips in the car nearly sent me insane. How am I gonna handle that? I'm hoping and praying that one day that smell revolts me as much as cigarette smoke does now that I've given up. I'm not as bad as I used to be with takeaway, I used to be really bad with stuff like KFC, but now I prefer to have a Subway. I just tend to eat too much. On the night before I started the Optifast, I made gnocchi for dinner and used pork belly in the sugo. My favourite. But as usual I ate too much. Way too much. It was bloody lovely though, I felt really full after, overfull actually. I don't get that feeling on the Optifast, which is probably a good thing. Apart from when my stomach starts growling. I hope it prepares me for when I have to go on the liquid diet.

I had a stupid thought last night. I was thinking about Christmas, specifically Christmas lunch at Sandra's. I know she'll put on a brilliant spread and I'm not going to be able to enjoy it. Especially my stuffing meatballs. My stupid thought was to ask the doc to postpone my op until after January. Just so I could pig out on Christmas day, and my birthday. But then I thought, that's one of my problems isn't it? Putting things off until later. So yep, I'll still enjoy Christmas, just with smaller portions.

Oh yeah, I forgot the most important thing. Weigh-in. 100kg exactly. I'm hoping to lose at least 30kg and if I get to that, I'll try for 40kg. I don't mind if it takes a year for me to get there. My goal is to be at least a size 12 for my 40th birthday. But I'm not going to overdo it. I'll keep things in perspective.

Just a test

2009-11-09T01:28:00.003Z

I need to kick myself up the arse and make sure to put things I promise to the top of the list.

Hopefully the label for Luna's diary has worked and moved it to the top of the label list. Makes it's easier for those posts to be found.

A few words from me

2009-10-15T15:43:00.002+01:00

I guess it's been awhile again. It's not that I mean to stay away. Just Tribal Wars and Facebook seem to be getting in the way. I need to make a stand and say NO to staying away. YES to more posting and OH HELL YES to Daniel being mean!

I guess I'll start off with telling people about myself again. The name is Jenni. I'm from Scotland and I'm not what I use to be. Sounds strange? Let me explain.

9 years ago, in November, my father passed away of Cancer. A year later it became clear to me that I was a shadow of my former self. I got into lots of trouble, I didn't care for myself much and it began to show. One way was in the form of self harming.

It's now 8 years later and I still struggle day to day but I'm getting better. Last week I went to a Red Dwarf convention. Couple of years ago I would never have been able to attend an event like this. Groups of people in rooms? NO WAY but I'm slowly getting better and I managed no problem.

You'll probably be asking my reason for telling people such personal things. It's to make people aware that individuals with a Mental Health problem CAN make it in the real world with a lot of work and positive thinking. I'm not saying it's always positive. Not at all. I'm struggling every day but there is hope in the horizon. Always speak to people. Make your feelings known and try and keep a smile on your face. It's not easy but it can be done.

ANYWAY, I'm going to stop typing now. Need to check my Tribal Wars to make sure I'm not being attacked by some 13 year old with balls bigger than melons because he thinks he's "hard" being in a successful tribe LOL

Take care and talk soon!

an Ode to the D Man

2009-07-31T09:25:00.002+01:00

D, just a letter to some, but it's a letter that is the beginning of a Great name

that is my name of course, My ego needs boosting so I have to do that, anyways Mr. D here with a random message to all those nutcases in this world like me, Stay True, stay nutty, stay insane, as I always say. You have to be Insane to be Sane in this Insane World, my words no others. nenni has tried to kill this blog, But I shall make it thrive with my words of wisdom.

have a nice day.

How annoying

2009-06-12T15:23:00.003+01:00

I'm in class again. Still can't look at anything interesting. No Bebo, Facebook, Twitter or Youtube. How am I suppose to fill in my time before finishing? I CAN'T LOOK AT ANYTHING.

Plus I can't Stumble with Firefox. They have gay I.E on these laptops. What I wouldn't give to have Firefox and my StumbleUpon button. Actually...what I wouldn't give to be able to Twitter or play FarmTown on Facebook. IT PASSES TIME. DON'T JUDGE ME!! Oh well. Finishing time!

Hello from the past..

2009-05-15T15:24:00.002+01:00

Well, not really. It's just The nenni deciding to make posts on the blog again. I'VE BEEN GONE FOR AGES! Which is such a shame. Put so much time and effort into this blog and have since let it slip.

Well I shall try my best to get it going again. Boring stories shall start again.

Time to go. Class is over.

A Birthday Wish

2008-01-14T15:54:00.000Z

HAPPY BIRTHDAY DANIEL!!!

Hope you've had a brilliant day and have many many many more to come!!

P.S You're still mean >=)

2 Tales

2008-01-14T15:33:00.000Z

Well..if you would call them tales.

I said I would come back and post about my time away in Glasgow, and show pictures of a tour I was booked to attend. Well, disaster struck on Wednesday.

The powers that be decided to torture us with gale force winds in some parts of Scotland and it just so happened to be my town. We got on the bus on time but the winds kept blowing the bus door open while we were driving down the carriage way toward Dundee. What would normally take just about an hour took us about 2 hours, and upon reaching Dundee we were told the bus would need to be fixed. Skip ahead 10 minutes and we're being told we would have to wait until 11am for the next bus to Glasgow. Skip ahead again another 20 minutes and the bus to Glasgow hasn't arrived when it was suppose to (11am). After much rolling of eyes at the guy who wouldn't stop complaining about "Nah makin it hame in time ta ha muh dinner" the bus arrived (which was 20 minutes late)..

We're now on our way to Glasgow but then it dawned on me. We wouldn't make the tour time slot. We wouldn't have made it to Glasgow until after 12pm, and then we would have to check in, and then find the train station, and then find the train to Edinburgh..It just wouldn't have been possible. It's an hour on the train to Edinburgh from Glasgow and we needed to be at The Dungeons between 12.30pm - 3.15pm. There was no way we would make it. So we had to scrap that plan (and the £11.90 I had paid for the tour) until another time when we could come down for a longer stay. To top all this off I felt like complete shit from the bus journey and lack of sleep the night before because of the ass who lives above my flat.

Things ended a little better with a trip to TGI Friday's and their Mac and Cheese bites, and their Jack Daniels sauce on some nice pieces of chicken and then a trip to the local Cinema to watch I am Legend (review to come). I now had to dread the trip home on the bus. Which did make me feel like shit again for the next 2 days. Word of advice...DON'T TRAVEL WITH MEGABUS..Unless you really have to!

My second tale is about my neighbours. It wont be a long post because I had to miss some of the action but in short..Police busted down their door because of drugs. Lots of banging, shouting and swearing..excitement! but I had to leave to go up to my grans. She wouldn't wait. So as I said. I missed most of the action. Who knows..maybe she had an afternoon punter in there? (she is a hooker after all) It's just my luck to have to miss the rest of the excitement. When I came back a council guy was attaching a new door and there was one copper left standing talking to him. I'll have to keep an eye out for any gossip on what happened.

Another year

2008-01-08T00:43:00.000Z

2008, huh? How's it going for everyone so far? Good? Excellent?
What's that? How's my year been so far? um...ok. I guess. Not earth shattering. Could be better.

I'm finding it just as hard to think of posts for this year as I did for last year. Which means there could be endless pointless posts. I seem to be good at those (like this one!)

OK. What to type about...I can't think of anything. Maybe because I'm too tired to think of anything. Yeah. That's probably it. So I'll end this and make a post later on in the week about my trip to Glasgow on Wednesday.

Anyway..Bye Bye

OH. I could leave you with a vid of me swearing to someone I know online. (just for something to post) Enjoy! EDIT: If anyone is going to look at the vid..don't click the play button in the center of the screen. Click the small one at the bottom. Thanks

A holiday message

2007-12-24T13:16:00.000Z

Merry Christmas and all the best for 2008 from all at Online Storm!!

2008 will bring more blog posts. That I can promise! I hope everyone reading this has a great christmas day! :D

24 Season 7 Trailer

2007-11-06T16:31:00.000Z

For anyone out there who loves 24 and hasnt seen the new trailer for seaosn 7, then here you go! I would just like to say OMG OMG OMG OMG!!!!

Enjoy!!

Scottish Women

2007-10-29T18:26:00.000Z

Three men were sitting together bragging about how they had given their new wives duties.

Terry had married a woman from America and bragged that he had told his wife she was going to do all the dishes and house cleaning that needed done at their house. He said that it took a couple days but on the third day he came home to a clean house and the dishes were all washed and put away.

Jimmy had married a woman from Australia. He bragged that he had given his wife orders that she was to do all the cleaning, dishes and the cooking. He told them that the first day he didn't see any results but the next day it was better. By the third day, his house was clean, the dishes were done and he had a huge dinner on the table.

The third man had married a Scottish girl. He boasted that he told her that her duties were to keep the house cleaned, dishes washed, lawn mowed, laundry washed and hot meals on the table for every meal.

He said the first day he didn't see anything, the second day he didn't see anything, but by the third day most of the swelling had gone down and he could see a little out of his left eye. Enough to fix himself a bite to eat, load the dishwasher, fill the washing machine and call a landscaper.

Birthday + Halloween

2007-10-29T00:04:00.000Z

Whoever says that growing old can be a good thing should be shot at point blank range. Seriously! Yesterday (27th Oct) was my 29th birthday and although I had a really good day...it means I'm one year older and one year closer to hitting the half way mark in my life. Sucks, I tell ya. Birthdays just aint the same like when you were a kid. I wish I had those days again. I mean who would really pass up the chance of living your childhood again? If you really think about it, and there was the option of knowing what you know now, you would do things a whole lot different. Just think of what you could achieve by making sure you paid better attention at school (like I wish), dating that guy/girl you lusted after...the list can be endless. I wish I had done things a whole lot different. Maybe I wouldn't be sitting here typing this out. I would have followed my dream and I would be a star in the West End, on the TV or on the big screen. Who really knows? I guess people will just say I'm feeling sorry for myself. You can make up your own mind about that.

On to the Halloween part. For my birthday I decided to treat my mum and I to a night out that could have ended in pure terror! We attended an evening of The Haunted Side of Fyvie Castle. Fyvie Castle is in Aberdeenshire and it is the most beautiful castle I have ever seen. Inside and out. Our evening began at 9pm with mulled wine and orange juice and a talk with the main tour guide of the Castle. Then it was downstairs for dinner of either chilli or vegetable stovies. Then we were moved to another room where a little mini play was performed for us and then it was back to the Dining Room for dessert.

We then split into groups of 17 and each group was taken around the Castle and told all about the history. When we reached "haunted" rooms we were told the different haunting stories. The main haunting that is spoken about is said to be that of Dame Lillias Drummond, wife of powerful Alexander Seton, the Earl of Dunfermline and Chancellor of Scotland. It's said that her husband locked her in the Gordon Bedroom after she failed to give him a son. He told her she wouldn't be allowed to leave that room until she gave birth to a son. She never granted his wish and she died in 1601. 9 months later Seton married his step niece, Grizel Leslie. On their wedding night, in what is now know as the Drummond Room, they were repeatedly disturbed by sighing and moaning coming from the window. In the morning, they found an inscription - Dame Lillias Drummond - facing outwards, distinctly carved with fine lettering into the outside of the window sill, some fifty feet above ground. The inscription is still there, and can be seen during a visit to the castle.

We were taken to the Gordon Bedroom and the guide was telling us a little about the history. She was about to take us into a small room just off from the bedroom when I heard a clink noise and at the same time my mum jumped and pointed. She had seen a large perfume bottle on the dressing table POP open. No one else has seen/heard anything and carried on walking to the other room. When the guide came out I asked her if that sort of thing happened and she said a couple of people had mentioned it before. She then picked up the perfume bottle and held it out for me to smell. There was a strong smell of rose perfume coming from it. She said there had been nothing in the bottle of YEARS. Some times it would have a smell and others it wouldnt. It's said that if there is a smell from the bottle that Dame Lillias was there.

Our tour carried on for a few more minutes and then everything had to come to an end. All in all it was a fucking brilliant night! and I plan on going back very soon before the season finishes. Just in the hope that the bottle top will pop open for us again. I hope you all have a nice Halloween night. Whatever your plans are. Happy Halloween from us all at Online Storm.

Movie Review - Run, Fatboy, Run

2007-09-07T00:04:00.000+01:00

Director: David Schwimmer
Cast: Simon Pegg, Dylan Moran, Thandie Newton, Hank Azaria, Harish Patel
Plot: A chunky, clueless guy leaves his pregnant fiancée on their wedding day only to discover, 5 years later, that she is his one true love. But in order to win back her heart, he looks to finish his first marathon while making her realise her new man is the wrong guy for her.

I can sum this up in 2 words...FUCKING BRILLIANT!! I just got back from watching the advanced screening of this movie and it's already in my Top 10 movies ever. Run, Fatboy, Run is just plain brilliant. Full of laughs and yet serious moments..I just about spat out water on the couple in front of me because I needed to laugh so hard. My friend and I even cried with laughter at one scene. If a movie can make me do that, then it's well worth watching. Believe me. I take my hat off to David Schwimmer. His directing was brilliant. Simon Pegg's re-write = CLASS! Dylan and Simon shine as a comedy duo. I highly recommend watching this movie. It gets a 10/10 from me and I'm sure others will love it too.

Offical Run, Fatboy, Run site can be viewed here and you can view one of the trailers (my fav one) on this very blog...below. ENJOY!!

Think...THINK !!

2007-08-30T16:11:00.000+01:00

Isn't it annoying when you've been in your car, maybe listening to the radio because your cd player still hasnt been fitted yet, and you hear a song that sounds quite catchy and you think to yourself:

"I need to get that downloaded! MEMO TO SELF..remember some of the lyrics to type into google because you'll most likely not remember the band or the song name"

Just me then?! I've got that problem right now. I've heard a song on the radio and really wanted it downloaded. I've heard it over and over again and I assumed I would remember the lyrics...

HOW WRONG WAS I? I've been sitting for about an hour trying to remember the lyrics. I know there's the word "shit" faded out so you don't hear it on the radio....and that's about all I remember.

I'm listening to my local radio online in the hope that the song will be played. Knowing my luck I wont hear it until I'm back in the car, driving to my mum's 50 miles away....

with no way to download anything but a chance that I can jot down what the band and song is!!

but then I'll most likely forget about that piece of paper and I'll be back to square one. GOD DAMNIT!

Till the time I can find out the name of the band and song, and post and tell anyone who's interested (which is probably the population of about -5000) I shall leave you with a vid of Mika singing Big Girl (You Are Beautiful) Love this song!!

80's Movie clips

2007-08-29T16:58:00.001+01:00

Seeing as I'm back posting I thought I would get the 80's movie clips up and going again. This week I've settled on Labyrinth from 1986.

Starring David Bowie and Jennifer Connelly this movie was about a young Sarah (Jennifer Connelly) who is left home alone by her parents and has to babysit her little brother Toby. But the baby keeps crying and Sarah, while telling him a story to make him sleep, inadvertently conjures from a fantasy world the Goblin King (David Bowie) who steals the child and brings him to his castle in the middle of a labyrinth. Sarah has to rescue him before midnight, or the baby will became a goblin. Brilliant movie. I always wanted to be Sarah and I couldnt get enough of watching the movie on video.

Below I've picked a clip of a song David Bowie sings in the movie. So hopefully it brings back memories and if it does...maybe you'll end up singing along? I know I did and I watched it a few times to keep singing it lol. There's also links below to the other 80's movies I've posted.

Monster Squad
Pump Up The Volume
Beetlejuice
Adventures In Babysitting
Spaceballs
The Breakfast Club

Lonach Gathering 2007

2007-08-29T15:24:00.000+01:00

Well, another year and another Lonach Gathering and yet more camping.

The Lonach kicked off on the 25th Aug at Bellabeg, Strathdon with the march of the clansmen (which I missed) and the rest of the day was even better than last year! It did rain but my sunburn shows that the sun came out.

We headed off to set up camp on the Friday. With only 3 if us being there this year it didnt take long to get things set up and by 7pm we were all ready to get the BBQ going for some food-age. By 9pm we were starving because we had problems getting the BBQ going but all was not lost. Nod got his cooker going and then we were set.

The Saturday was busy. With all the usual stalls and entertainment I felt right at home. For people's viewing pleasure I took a video of a Pipe Band playing for the crowd and as part of a competition. They're playing Flower Of Scotland and Scotland The Brave. I shall apologise right now for the swearing you'll hear. That is me and my foul mouth lol.

Here's a couple of pics of our tents. Not that exciting. Pic 1 (our tent) and Pic 2 (Denise and Nod's tent)

After having a tea break back at the camp site, Denise, Nod and myself headed back to the main area and finally got good pics of Billy Connolly (scottish comedian) and if you click here you'll find a picture of his wife Pamela Stephenson (actress, comedian and now clinical psychologist) These are the best pics we've ever got of them.

After spending some time in the main area we called it a day and on the way back I decided to take a vid of Jake. This guy is there every year and every year he can be seen by the road playing for the public. He must make a fortune with his busking. He always wears the same gear and he always plays the same songs but he's brilliant! Denise can be seen in the background in the red jacket and Nod can then be seen and heard saying "Cya next year!"

and just for my enterainment here's a pic of my mum and Denise dancing to the TimeWarp. Maybe my mum will stop by and have a look. If she does...HIYA MUMMY!!!!! LIKE YOU PICTURE?!?! ahahahahaha <3!! Please don't kill me for putting it on here. Our viewing puplic will love it!

All in all we had a smashing time! We're already thinking of things to buy next year to try and beat Denise and Nod and maybe I'll be able to get a vid of Billy Connolly for all to see. If you have no idea who Billy Connolly is then you can look at his website here or check out his vids on youtube here. See how nice I am? I even got you the search page so you don't have to do it yourself! You can also read about 2006 and 2005's Lonach Gatherings here or by clicking the Lonach label at the side. I hope you enjoy watching the videos and looking at the pics.

An old welcome

2007-08-29T15:20:00.000+01:00

...for me. I'm gonna get off my arse and post here more. So HELLO to me from myself and it's about time!! and also to any readers out there. Hello to you all too!

Minneapolis Bridge Collapse Raw News Breaking

2007-08-02T22:58:00.001+01:00

This is just horrible. It happened during evening rush hour traffic. Over 50 cars/trucks tumbled into the water.

There was a check done on the structure of the bridge two years, and it was determined that the bridge was structurally unstable yet no work was started on it after that and it has remained open. Then this happens. Over a quarter of the bridges in the US are considered structurally unstable. Why is nothing being done about them? Maybe now things will start changing, but it is tragic that the changes have to come after loss of lives.

No hope !

2007-07-22T17:20:00.000+01:00

These days I'm really starting to wonder why I want to go after things I want. Everything just comes back to bite me on the ass and it's seriously making me question why I've chosen these paths. The past few days I've been down about just about everything. Take today. It's come to my attention that my dream of being a good photographer might not be as reachable as I thought. When I was younger I could take killer photos. Everyone either wanted a copy of my pictures or couldnt stop talking about them. These days I'm lucky if I get one good photo out of all I've taken with my new camera. Is it me? Am I just not in the right frame of mind, or in the right mood to take good photos? Have I lost that edge I use to have? That ability to see what would make a good photo? or am I just moaning about it too much and I should slap myself, pick myself up and make damn sure I get back to how I once was?

To be honest, if the latter applies to me then that's going to be difficult. Short of someone coming and slapping me silly and telling me to "get a grip", I think I'm on the road of no return, or maybe it's just the time of year. Maybe it's just because of everything I've gone through this year so far. The thought of maybe not being able to have kids. The thought of not getting to be with a someone, even if just for a day, because it's not as easy as I thought to be near. Whatever the reason...it's killing me.

Doods

2007-07-05T14:04:00.000+01:00

The blog is falling behind again =(

When I get back from my mum's (hopefully on Monday) then I'll get posting more stuff. So follow my lead? Or I'll send wild Haggis in the post to you all.

Offensive? Do me a lemon!

2007-06-26T11:22:00.000+01:00

While reading a newspaper on Sunday I came across an article about Scottish history and it annoyed me!

IT has been hailed as Scotland's greatest victory over the Auld Enemy by everyone from Robert the Bruce to the Tartan Army. But now the National Trust have decided that the Battle of Bannockburn was "not England v Scotland". The claim, made at a meeting to plan today's annual re-enactment of the 1314 battle at Bannockburn Heritage Centre and monument, has outraged historians.
National Trust Scotland's West Regional director Michael Hunter said it should be seen as a feud between two kings - Robert the Bruce and Edward II. In a taped record of the meeting, he claimed: "We have to be quite careful how we present the battle - it is not England v Scotland. "It was two kings fighting against each other."

What a crock of shit! It was England v Scotland to which we won. Why should it be changed to King v King? It's an important part of Scottish history and people should NOT be denied the truth! Robert The Bruce led Scotland in that battle and it gave us our independence. We have a right to be allowed to keep it the title of England v Scotland.

The Trust's property manager at Bannockburn, Alison Corley, said: "If you just make it a Scottish and English battle then you are not doing it justice.

It's worked well for many years and it's done the battle a lot of justice. Why change it now?! In case someone is offended? WHO? Has anyone been offended before? From what I know..English people have been to visit the site for many years and to my knowledge have never been offended. In this day and age more things cause offense to people but why is that? If it's never bothered them before, then why the change of mind? It pisses me off that the smallest little thing can be classed as offensive to people. We seem to be walking on eggshells every minute of the day, and me personally I'm sick of it. I will always class the battle of Bannockburn as England v Scotland and if I offend someone I don't care. Scottish history, and any countries history, should NOT be changed to suit other people. We need to be proud of our history and we need to stand up and voice our opinion if people want to change it!

You can read the story from the newspaper here and about the Battle of Bannockburn here.

Britain's Got Talent

2007-06-12T15:44:00.000+01:00

This show started a few days ago and while watching one show, my mother and I couldn't stop laughing. My sides were aching at this one act. Here's a vid of said act called Damon Scott. You really need to watch this!!

UK Big Brother 2007

2007-06-07T16:43:00.000+01:00

Last week (Wednesday) UK's Big Brother started. I love Big Brother. So I was all excited. Imagine my shock when it turned out to be 11 females ONLY in the house. Not to worry. One guy went into the house on Friday night. There's been bitching and arguements but today it emerged that one of the housemates has been removed from the house. Why? I hear you all ask. Well..here's the story.

Emily, 19 from bristol was removed from the house in the early hours of this morning after using a racially offensive word to a fellow housemate. Emily was with 2 fellow housemates when she was heard saying "Are you pushing it out, you n*****?" to Charley. She then stated that she never meant it in an offensive way to which Charley and Nicky agreed they were not personally offended, although both of them were very shocked at Emily's language.

Emily was one of two housemates nominated for eviction this week and as a result the lastest eviction vote has been suspended. You can read the full story here.

Movie Review - Pirates of The Caribbean: At World's End

2007-06-07T16:20:00.000+01:00

Director: Gore Verbinski
Cast: Johnny Depp, Geoffrey Rush, Orlando Bloom, Keira Knightley, Bill Nighy, Chow-Yun Fat, Jack Davenport, Kevin McNally and Tom Hollander
Plot: Barbossa, Will, Elizabeth, Tia Delma, and crew set out to rescue Jack from Davey Jones locker so they can call the Pirate Lords from the four corners of the globe, including the infamous Sao Feng, to a gathering in an attempt to come up with a plan to defeat Lord Cutler Beckett, who himself has control of Jones' heart and has formed a dark alliance with him in order to rule the seas and wipe out the last of the Pirates. The Pirate Lords want to release the goddess Calypso, Davey Jones's damned lover, from the trap they sent her to out of fear, in which the Pirate Lords must combine the 9 pieces that bound her by ritual to undo it and release her in hopes that she will help them fight. With this, all pirates will stand together and will make their final stand for freedom against Beckett, Jones, Norrington, the Flying Dutchman, and the entire East India Trading Company.

People who know me know I love Pirates of The Caribbean but now they need to know that I want to MARRY Pirates of The Caribbean! I loved this movie. Packed full of action and good storylines, it kept me gripped all the way through. I will admit that it started off a wee bit slow but it soon picked up. I liked the fact that some of the old characters from the first movie had turned up again. I was a little disappointed they were missing from the second movie but it was no biggy.
I would urge everyone to see this movie. It is a long movie and thank god for the 10 minute break in it that our cinema had. The end of the movie leaves so many unanswered questions, which I hope will lead to a fourth. My only concern would be them making a fourth and it would be too much. I'll be keeping my eyes peeled to see how it all pans out. I give this movie a rating of 10/10 =)

Pirates of The Caribbean: At World's End offical website

New Desktop

2007-05-29T22:14:00.000+01:00

I'm coming back with the old posts again. Back with my desktop pictures!

This one was found by chance by Luna after I had trouble finding a picture I really liked. It's dark yet calm and suits me just fine. Thank you, Smeghead =)

PCOS - Update

2007-05-17T21:18:00.000+01:00

New update with my PCOS - I started taking a pill called Metformin.

Metformin is a type of drug known as an 'insulin-sensitising agent', which lowers the blood sugar level, in turn reducing the excessively high insulin. There are actually very few studies that have been carried out and published concerning the use of insulin sensitising drugs as a treatment for PCOS. These suggest that it may well be useful in several areas: helping weight reduction, improving irregular periods (70%), normalising blood cholesterol and leading to ovulation.

I have to take one pill for the first week. On Friday I have to start taking 2 pills and then the Friday after that I have to take 3 pills. Each pill is 500g. So in total I'll be taking 1500g of Metformin daily.

The first day I took the pill I got the attack of the shakes and it was really bad. I went shopping and that's when I noticed the shaking. I also thought I was going to be sick right in the middle of ASDA. The next couple of days were ok but on Monday things were different. I spent most of the day on the toilet and I've felt like crap ever since.

The most common side effects during treatment are diarrhoea, nausea, vomiting and abdominal bloating.

I have two of those so far. I've been told these side effects will last between 1 to 4 weeks and I should start seeing results in about 3 to 4 months. It's only the first week and I'm starting to lose hope already. Oh and it's made my bleeding really heavy. More heavy than before. I have to see my doctor again in 3 weeks time to see how things are getting on. I'm also really hungry!! I've not been eating much because I dont like the side effects. Which isnt smart on my part, I know. I'll keep you updated.

I'd like again to encourage women who think they have any symptoms of PCOS as stated in this post to go see a doctor so you can start treatment. Please dont suffer in silence!

I'm also going to tell you about a blog called Soul Cysters. Started by a woman who's 16 year old Daughter has PCOS. The woman very kindly left me a comment and I've decided to link her blog here for others to read. The URL is here and also listed under Blogs We Read section down the side. Take the time to read her blog if you have any concerns about PCOS or you have PCOS. Thanks!

Official

2007-05-10T12:11:00.000+01:00

This morning it became official with a letter from the hospital. I have Polycystic ovarian syndrome, which I kind of knew anyway after the doctor at the maternity clinic said in her opinion I did have PCOS. The letter says "your ultrasound scan findings were in keeping with polycystic ovarian syndrome"..IT'S ONLY TAKEN YOU 4 WEEKS TO SEND ME THIS BLOODY LETTER!

Anyway, with another tiny weight off my shoulder I can now start medication to control my symptoms. I really do urge anyone who has the slighest hint that she coul;d have pcos to get in contact with your doctor and get tested.

No Justice

2007-05-09T03:14:00.000+01:00

I am complete upset. People complain about all the crime in the world. You see it all over TV and they sit their at their little desks and ask and ponder on how things could of been different with the suspects. The problems start at home and not just with the parents but with our legal system.
The other day Krystal told her exboyfriend that she didn't want to have any more contact with him because even though they haven't been going out for the last 8 months, he is still jealous and obsessive over her. He would get angry when she would go out with her friends and stuff like that. Anyways, my boyfriend's son threatened to beat his ass if he didn't leave her alone (childish, I know). Some of his friends jump Michael a few days later and beat his ass. Then later that night, about 3 in the morning, they beat on Krystal's window and then throw a rock through it. My boyfriend goes out there and by the time he got outside, they were gone. Krystal saw them do this. We call the police and the police just tell us, "Since you can't exactly say who threw the rock, then we can't do anything". What kind of shit is that. Both of those boys should of been arrested. Now we have to fix a broken window, which comes out of our pocket. One of the boys is already on probation.
What is this teaching our children and teenagers? That they can get away with anything and there are no consequences. That is why there are so many people out there harming others. They have been told by the Justice System they can get away with it. Just like with Drugs, they pick up people dealing and using drugs, tell them that if they turn over on so many people they can walk with just probabtion. That puts them right back on the streets doing the exact same thing they were doing. I saw it all the time in my old neighborhood.
It just pisses me off. Someone should stand up and point out that the Justice system in America is screwed up.

Movie Review - Spider-man 3

2007-05-08T18:54:00.000+01:00

Director: Sam Raimi
Cast: Toby Maguire, Kirsten Dunst, James Franco, Thomas Haden Church, Topher Grace and James Cromwell.
Plot: Peter Parker has finally managed to piece together the once-broken parts of his life, maintaining a balance between his relationship with Mary-Jane and his responsibility as Spider-Man. But more challenges arise for our young hero. Peter's old friend Harry Obsourne has set out for revenge against Peter; taking up the mantle of his late father's persona as The New Goblin, and Peter must also capture Uncle Ben's real killer, Flint Marko, who has been transformed into his toughest foe yet, the Sandman. All hope seems lost when suddenly Peter's suit turns jet-black and greatly amplifies his powers. But it also begins to greatly amplify the much darker qualities of Peter's personality that he begins to lose himself to. Peter has to reach deep inside himself to free the compassionate hero he used to be if he is to ever conquer the darkness within and face not only his greatest enemies, but also himself.

This movie was brilliant! One I know I will go into see again in the very near future. This third instalment in the Spiderman story is by far the best. In my opinion, it's far better than the second movie. The second movie was full of action and I do have to say...a little too much action. The third movie centers more around the story but at the same time has the perfect amount of action. Not too much and not too little. It answers a lot of questions to how Peter and MJ are handling things in their relationship and it also leaves you hanging on with questions and ideas running around in your head as to what could happen if another instalment was to happen. There has been talk that this was the final in the story. I sure hope not! It's been left open for an even bigger storyline in a 4th instalment, and with the idea of new plotlines talked about on the car journey home between my friend and I, it would be a killer movie! Tobey Maguire gives another perfect disply of acting in his role as Spiderman, with Kirsten Dunst and James Franco near enough equal with him. This really is a movie you need to see on the big screen. Get ticket buying, people! I give this movie a 91/2 out of 10.

Spider-man 3 website

Movie Review: Night at the Museum

2007-05-03T13:29:00.000+01:00

I wasn't really sure I would like this movie. I am not much for comedies, and the trailors made it seem like a movie more for children. We bought it this past weekend and I am so glad that we did.
Larry, played by Ben Stiller, is a divorced father who has never finished anything he starts. He can't hold a steady job and is constantly having to move due to evictions. Because of this, it is causing turmoil between him and his son. He goes to a temp agency and they refer him to the Museum to take a job as the night watch man. His first night working there, every thing in the museum comes to life. The movie is extremely funny. Robin Williams, Dick Van Dyke, and Mickey Rooney play in this movie.
My daughter found this movie funny and stayed up and watched the whole movie. It is a great movie for all ages. Between the wild, humourous antics that each character in the museum does, to the morals and story line between Larry and his son. There is also a little bit of a love story. There are a few lessons that the movie teaches.
I recommend this movie to people of all ages. I enjoyed it and will enjoy watching it again with my family.

I didn't fall off the face of the earth

2007-05-02T00:55:00.000+01:00

I hope all is well with everyone and I am very happy to be back. Hopefully I will have time to catch up with all of you, if I can figure out how to download things to this computer that I need. I have figured out some things but others take time. It took me almost 30 minutes to figure out how to log onto here because I forgot how I put my user name.

Puzzle for you all

2007-05-01T14:06:00.000+01:00

Work out this puzzle and lets see who is the correct one.

"How old are you grandma?", the young boy asked one day...

"Don't you know its rude to ask a lady's age?" replied Grandma to the curious little boy...

"Sorry", replied the boy, "I didnt know, but I still want to know your age?"

"Well... see if you can solve this puzzle", smiled the old lady, "It will help you with your sums."

The little boy listened as his grandma spoke.

"Next year", said the old lady "I will be six times as old as I am now, less six times as old as i was 10 years ago.."

How old is Grandma?

Kick in the teeth

2007-05-01T01:40:00.000+01:00

I guess I asked for the kick in the teeth I was just given. I asked a couple of people online to suggest which of my photos I should think about putting forward in an Amateur Competition. It's all for fun but I was told "none of your photos are worth bothering to add to a competition. Not even for fun" Well thanks for the daily kick in the teeth I seem to be getting these days. Below is a photo I was thinking of entering but now I wont even bother.

I know my photos are not that great. I've taken much much better in the past. I put it down to all the personal stuff I'm going through right now. I don't seem to have the eye for things these days. Oh well. Back to taking crap photos!

Couple of jokes

2007-04-30T21:51:00.000+01:00

Just a couple of jokes for you all.

In the hospital the relatives gathered in the waiting room, where their family member lay gravely ill.

Finally, the doctor came in looking tired and somber. "I'm afraid I'm the bearer of bad news," he said as he surveyed the worried faces.

"The only hope left for your loved one at this time is a brain transplant. It's an experimental procedure, very risky but it is the only hope. Insurance will cover the procedure, but you will have to pay for the brain yourselves."

The family members sat silent as they absorbed the news. After a great length of time, someone asked, "Well, how much does a brain cost?"

The doctor quickly responded, "£5,000 for a male brain, and £200 for a female brain."

The moment turned awkward. Men in the room tried not to smile, avoiding eye contact with the women, but some actually smirked. A man unable to control his curiosity, blurted out the question everyone wanted to ask

"Why is the male brain so much more?"

The doctor smiled at the childish innocence and explained to the entire group,
"It's just standard pricing procedure. We have to mark down the price of the
female brains, because they've actually been used."

_____________________________________________________________________

I pulled an older woman at a club last night.

She was a right sort for 57, we drank a bit, had a bit of a snog and she asked if I'd ever had the sportsman's double, a mother and daughter 3 some? I said no.

We drank a bit more, then she says that tonight was my lucky night.

I went back to her place. She put the hall light on and shouted upstairs: "Mum you still awake?"

PCOS - Polycystic ovarian syndrome

2007-04-23T22:02:00.000+01:00

I want to take this time to highlight something that is close to my heart, and that's PCOS (Polycystic ovarian syndrome). I've posted about it before because I was going through some tests to see if my problems were caused by PCOS. My next doctors appointment will most likely have the outcome for being told I 100% have PCOS. I'm making this post so that other women might recognise some of the symptoms and then seek help and tests. So here goes. Please read carefully and if anything in this post rings true to you, then please seek help from the doctor.

Polycystic ovarian syndrome (PCOS), also known by the name Stein-Leventhal syndrome, is a hormonal problem that causes women to have a variety of symptoms. Some of the symptoms include:

* absent or infrequent periods (oligomenorrhoea): a common symptom of PCOS. Periods can be as frequent as every five to six weeks, but might only occur once or twice a year, if at all.

* increased facial and body hair (hirsutism): usually found under the chin, on the upper lip, forearms, lower legs and on the abdomen (usually a vertical line of hair up to the umbilicus).

* acne: usually found only on the face.

* infertility: infrequent or absent periods are linked with very occasional ovulation, which significantly reduces the likelihood of conceiving.

* overweight/obesity: a common finding in women with PCOS because their body cells are resistant to the sugar-control hormone insulin. This insulin resistance prevents cells using sugar in the blood normally and the sugar is stored as fat instead.

* miscarriage (sometimes recurrent): one of the hormonal abnormalities in PCOS, a raised level of luteinising hormone (LH - a hormone produced by the brain that affects ovary function), seems to be linked with miscarriage. Women with raised LH have a higher miscarriage rate (65 per cent of pregnancies end in miscarriage) compared with those who have normal LH values (around 12 per cent miscarriage rate).

Any of the above symptoms and signs may be absent with the exception of irregular or no periods. All women with PCOS will have irregular or no menses. Women who have PCOS do not regularly ovulate; that is, they do not release an egg every month. This is why they do not have regular periods. No one is quite sure what causes PCOS. However, the ovaries of women with PCOS frequently contain a number of small cysts, hence the name poly (many) cystic ovarian syndrome. A similar number of cysts may occur in women without PCOS. Therefore, the cysts themselves do not seem to be the cause of the problem. A malfunction of the body's blood sugar control system (insulin system) is frequent in women with PCOS. The result is an inadequate response to insulin (insulin resistance) that can lead to abnormally elevated blood sugar (glucose) levels. The insuliin disturbance is thought to also be the trigger for the development of symptoms such as acne and excess hair growth that is seen with PCOS.

The diagnosis is based on the patient's symptoms and physical appearance. If the diagnosis seems likely because the patient's history contains many of the symptoms described already, certain investigations are done to provide confirmatory evidence or to indicate another cause for the symptoms. These include:

* Blood tests such as
- Female Sex Hormones (at a certain point in the cycle if possible)
- Male Sex Hormones
- Glucose
- Thyroid Function Tests
- Other Hormones, eg Prolactin
* Ultrasound Examination

Your own GP can do the initial blood investigations, ensuring they are carried out at the correct time of the cycle if appropriate. Your GP may be able to arrange an ultrasound scan. Once the diagnosis is made, nothing more needs to be done for some women, eg if their fertility is not an issue, if their weight is within normal limits, and if they do not have excess body hair. If any of the symptoms are an issue, then further advice and treatment, and possibly specialist referral is needed.

PCOS often comes to light during puberty due to period problems, which affects around 75% of those with the disease. Infrequent, irregular or absent periods are all common variations, many finding their periods particularly heavy when they do arrive. The period disturbance is a sign that there is a problem with regular monthly ovulation. So just why do your periods go out of whack when you suffer from PCOS? The main culprit is hormonal imbalance

If you recognise two or more of these symptoms in yourself, make an appointment with your health care provider to investigate whether you may have PCOS. While a cure for PCOS has yet to be found, effective treatment for these symptoms is available.

Virginia Tech Shootings

2007-04-18T23:33:00.000+01:00

Cho Seung-hui, the student who killed 33 people; including himself, on Monday sent a package to the US TV network NBC News on the day of the shootings. The package contained "disturbing" photographs, video and writings, NBC said, apparently sent between the two rounds of killings.

Two people were killed at the West Ambler Johnston Hall, a university dormitory, at 0715 on Monday. Two hours later Cho killed 30 others, plus himself, at the Norris Hall complex across campus. Authorities have not yet linked the 23-year-old to any of those he killed. Cho was admitted to a mental health unit in late 2005. He was sent for evaluation after two female students made complaints against him. You can read the full story here. You'll also find links to key stories about the shooting on this page.

80's Movie clips

2007-04-18T22:19:00.000+01:00

Yes, people. It's back. The clips of movies we all know/love/need to watch from the 80's. Today's clip is of the uber famous John Hughes' The Breakfast Club from 1985. If you havent heard or seen this movie then where the hell have you been?!

Starring Emilio Estevez, Anthony Michael Hall, Judd Nelson, Molly Ringwald and Ally Sheedy the movie is about 5 kids who are thrown together by Saturday morning detention. Each begins to see the others apart from their stereotypes. Andrew, the jock; Brian, the geek; John, the wastoid; Claire, the popular Prom Queen; and Allison, the psycho girl; each finds qualities about the others that make the Saturday morning change their lives. An excellent watch and must have for any movie collection. I've picked a clip of the famous dance scene in the library. One which has been copied by near enough everyone at some point in their lives or career. Enjoy the clip and may it bring back memories.

There's links at the bottom to the past clips I've posted so far of 80's movies.

Monster Squad
Pump Up The Volume
Beetlejuice
Adventures in Babysitting
Spaceballs

Feel

2007-04-12T22:06:00.000+01:00

I wanted to post lyrics for a song sung by Robbie Williams. It pretty much sums up my last few days and how I've been feeling..

Feel

Come and hold my hand
I wanna contact the living
Not sure I understand
This role I´ve been given
I sit and talk to God
And he just laughs at my plans
My head speaks a language
I don´t understand

I just want to feel real love
Fill the home that I live in
Cause I got too much life
Running through my veins
Going to waste

I don´t want to die
But I ain´t keen on living either
Before I fall in love
I´m preparing to leave her
I scare myself to death
That´s why I keep on running
Before I´ve arrived
I can see myself coming

I just want to feel real love
Fill the home that I live in
Cause I got too much life
Running through my veins
Going to waste
And I need to feel real love
And a life ever after
I cannot get enough

I just want to feel real love
Fill the home that I live in
I got too much love
Running through my veins
To go to waste
I just wanna feel real love
In a life ever after
There´s a hole in my soul
You can see it in my face
It´s a real big place

Come and hold my hand
I want to contact the living
Not sure I understand
This role I´ve been given
Not sure I understand
Not sure I understand
Not sure I understand
Not sure I understand

Missing shopping

2007-04-03T20:56:00.000+01:00

Isnt it annoying when you get home from food shopping and realise that one thing you really needed, one thing that would keep you from going insane, the one thing that would stop you being bitten to death isnt in your shopping bag? No? Only me then?

The one thing that would keep me alive is biscuits for my cat pyper. If she doesnt have her biscuits, then my life isnt worth living till she does. I'm not kidding either. She can be evil, and she wont settle for any other biscuits other than Whiskas Temptations Beef flavour.

Now you may think that I just clear forgot to buy them but I didnt! I would have bought them if it hadnt been for the old guy in the dairy cream cake aisle. IT'S ALL HIS FAULT! His and a songs fault. Infact...His, the songs and ASDA shopping stores fault. While walking around picking up things I needed, I noticed they were playing the song You Raise Me Up. I hate this song even on a good day. So imagine my horror when I reached the dairy cream aisle and was interupted by an old guy WHISTLING the song over and over. I couldn't think. I couldn't decide what I needed and the cat food thought left my head and wondered off on it's own. If it hadn't been for that old guy and his crap whistling of a crap song, then I would have remembered the cat biscuits. Now I have to make sure I dont walk about my apartment. Pyper is on the prowl and I'd like to keep my legs!

Always a bad word

2007-04-02T23:17:00.000+01:00

Two words were evil to me...TRAFFIC WARDENS !

..but not anymore (for now anyway). My change of heart? Last sunday evening, while driving home from my mothers, I was annoyed to learn that I had a puncture. I kept my cool though because unlike some women, I know how to change a car tyre. My dad tought me when I was younger. Anywho...I got the stuff I needed out of the boot/trunk and then I was smacked in the face with a slipper. Kind of. I noticed that I didnt have a wrench to help get the bolts/nuts off. My smiles soon faded. After a few phonecalls someone came to help me but it turned out their wrench was too big. To cut the story a little...I had to leave my car overnight but it was parked in a permit zone. Now I'm starting to worry.

I called the police to ask for advice and was told I would have to call the council. 8:20am the next morning I was on the phone talking with the traffic warden department. They very kindly told me that the car would be cool where it was parked but only for one day. I wouldn't get a single parking ticket and they held their word. When I finally got back to the car, there was no parking tickets at all. So for now I'm cool with traffic wardens. I shall say no more bad words about them (until a chance passes by of them issuing me with a ticket)

Oh. I got the tyre changed, btw. Everything is cool!

Pictures from Scotland

2007-03-28T15:59:00.000+01:00

This is a new thing I've decided to do. Me and my camera are traveling. We're on a quest. A quest of great importance. We're taking pictures of Castles/Manor Houses/Anything historic in Scotland.

I decided to start this because I found it hard to find pictures of places to show Luna. I mean, you can find some pictures but some are very limited. My pictures are not bad. They're not great but at least it shows you different things about each place.

So far I've got pics of Glenbuchat Castle which is located on a bluff above the River Don in Aberdeenshire. It was built in 1590 for John Gordon of Cairnbarrow and his wife Helen on the occasion of their wedding. You can read more about the castle here.

I always have pictures of Leith Hall in Aberdeenshire. Leith Hall was built by the Leith family in 1650 and remained in the Leith-Hay family until 1945. There were extensions added to Leith Hall in 1738, 1810 and in 1904. It was built on the site of the medieval Peill Castle. You can read more about Leith Hall here, and you can also read about their ghosts! I've not been inside Leith Hall yet. It wasnt open for visitors but when it is, I'll be adding more pictures.

I hope people enjoy looking at the pictures as much as I did taking them. Loads more historic places to come. So keep checking back for updates. There is a listing on the side of the blog to everywhere I've taken pictures of.

It's about time

2007-03-19T18:52:00.000Z

I'm finally getting home tomorrow. I cant bloody wait. It's been too long in coming. Any longer left in this place and I might end up going crazy.

I can finally get things moving on here too. Not liking the page rank going down!

80's Movies

2007-03-08T19:31:00.000Z

Yet again I'm back with another classic 80's movie for your viewing pleasure. All the movies that I loved in the 80's will be brought to you here. I hope they bring back fond memories. They do to me and that's why I own a lot of them on dvd!

Past movies are Monster Squad, Pump Up The Volume, Beetlejuice, Adventures in Babysitting.

Today I'm taking you back to 1987 and the movie Spaceballs. Staring Mel Brooks, Rick Moranis, Bill Pullman, Daphne Zuniga and John Candy. The planet Spaceball, home planet of the evil Spaceballs is running out of air and the planet's ruler President Skroob (Brooks) has devised a evil scheme, where he plans to steal the air from the atmosphere of the peaceful planet Druidia. When Druidia's ruler King Roland's beautiful daughter Princess Vespa (Zuniga) and her loyal droid Dot Matrix flees from Druidia during her wedding to Prince Valium, The evil commander of the Spaceball fleet, Dark Helmet (Moranis) captures Princess Vespa so King Roland will be forced to give them the access code to the defense shield surrounding planet Druidia. But heroic space pilot Lone Starr (Pullman) and his sidekick, Barf (Candy) (A Mog half man-half Dog) comes to Princess Vespa's rescue. With help from wise and powerful master of the magic ring "The Schwartz" Yogurt, Lone Starr, Barf, Dot and Princess Vespa set out to save Druida and foil Dark Helmet and President Scroob's scheme and prevent them from stealing the air from Druidia.

A brilliant comedy and well worth the watch. It makes fun of certain parts of Star Wars and you'll never be short of laughs. Enjoy the clip. It's the best I could find, sorry.

I'm sorry

2007-03-05T23:58:00.000Z

Dear uncle,

Today your life changed. Today became the beginning of the end. I've thought about all the times we've talked and laughed but I can't help but feel a complete bastard.
Ever since my Dad died, we've seen less of each other. All the times I've had nothing to do and never once did I come to see you. I've wasted so much time on all the wrong things.
I should have had the right piece of mind to spend more time with you.
I should have insisted that I do your shopping for you.
I should have made you more cups of coffee and toast while I've been with you.
I should have talked to you about my feelings of everything.
And most of all...I should have told you I love you a lot more than I have done.

I cried today. I couldn't help but cry but then I wondered to myself. Do I really have the right to cry as much as I did? Did I cry more because memories of the day my dad told me he had cancer came flooding back to me? And does this make me selfish? The more I thought of it, I realised the answer is no. I'm not selfish and yes. I have the right to bawl my eyes out if I want to because, you see, I don't have to tell you every day that I love you because you know I love you with all my heart. You've been in my thoughts every day. Could have been just for 2-3 minutes at a time but I still thought of you and why did I do that? The answer is simple. You are like a father to me...in my heart. Maybe not in the physical but in the mental way of me thinking.

You've been through so much in your life and you've kept smiling. You've never let your disability stop you from showing your true colours. A man who laughed in the face of every virus you caught, every obstacle that came your way. I know that you are smiling through all this even though inside your heart is breaking. I feel truely honoured to have had someone like you in my life, to have known your life, to have had you as an uncle (even though you're not really an uncle). My Dad always said that you were the best person he had ever known and now I understand why. I still feel like a bastard because it's taken the news that you're dying to make me realise this.

I hope in your heart you can forgive me for not being there like I should have. I hope you can forgive me for being selfish. I hope you can forgive me for not burning your toast enough when I did make it for you. I love you with every piece of my heart. Always have and I always will, and I'm going to make sure you know I do. This isnt the beginning of the end. It's the start of another life of you fishing with my Dad in his little cottage with a stream at the bottom of the garden. He'll have made sure it's full of every fish you ever wanted to catch but couldnt. You'll laugh and joke about the days you both drove taxis for the same firm. He'll take care of you till we all meet again and when that day comes, you'll tell me you heard my message to you. I'll be telling it to you every day for only you and my dad to hear.

Till that day, I'm going to see you as much as I can manage. I'm going to try and make up for every single minute I missed with you. I truly am sorry!

Love you,

Jenni xxxx

-I wanted to write this letter for my Uncle who is dying of lung cancer and doesnt have much time left.

Lunar Eclipse

2007-03-04T12:09:00.000Z

Lastnight I braved the cold weather to stand outside and take pictures of the Lunar Eclipse (that's a picture I took at the side). It was amazing to watch and I wish I took more pictures after 12am. The eclipse began at 2018 GMT, with the Moon totally immersed in the shadow of the Earth between 2244 and 2358 GMT. It was the first total Lunar Eclipse in more than 3 years.

I took other pictures than just these two. pic 3, pic 4, pic 5, pic 6, pic 7, pic 8. The last 2 pictures might be best viewed either standing up a little or tilting your screen (if you have a laptop) I think I did pretty well considering that I'm still learning how to use my camera and I don't have a large lense to help me with long distance viewing. Hope you like them.

You can read about the Lunar Eclipse and see more pictures taken by others (much much better than mine) here.

Desktop

2007-03-01T02:49:00.000Z

A change of desktop was long overdue and here I am showing off my new pic. It's of Simon Pegg and Nick Frost who star in....you guessed it (from the screenshot) Hot Fuzz!

Joke of the day

2007-02-26T19:08:00.000Z

A 95 year old man is given a jar to provide a sperm sample.

He turns up 2 days later with the jar empty

Nurse asks "Why no sample?"
He says "Sorry, but I tried with my right hand and then my left. My wife tried with both hands, her mouth, then with her teeth in and with them out. Ethel from next door tried but it was all no good. We just could not get the fucking lid off the jar!"

79th Academy Awards - The Results

2007-02-26T13:07:00.000Z

Here are the results of the 79th Academy Awards that took place lastnight at the Kodak Theatre in Los Angeles.

Best picture
WINNER: The Departed
Babel
Letters From Iwo Jima
Little Miss Sunshine
The Queen

Best director
WINNER: Martin Scorsese, The Departed
Clint Eastwood, Letters From Iwo Jima
Stephen Frears, The Queen
Paul Greengrass, United 93
Alejandro Gonzales Inarritu, Babel

Best actor
WINNER: Forest Whitaker, The Last King of Scotland
Leonardo DiCaprio, Blood Diamond
Ryan Gosling, Half Nelson
Peter O'Toole, Venus
Will Smith, The Pursuit of Happyness

Best actress
WINNER: Helen Mirren, The Queen
Penelope Cruz, Volver
Judi Dench, Notes on a Scandal
Meryl Streep, The Devil Wears Prada
Kate Winslet, Little Children

Best animated feature film
WINNER: Happy Feet
Cars
Monster House

Best visual effects
WINNER: Pirates of the Caribbean: Dead Man's Chest
Poseidon
Superman Returns

You can read the rest of the results here.

What piffle !

2007-02-25T12:43:00.000Z

Before anyone says anything about me using the word piffle..

n.
Foolish or futile talk or ideas; nonsense.

Got that over and done with.

After spending over a month stuck at my mothers, I finally got to go home this tuesday passed. It was bliss! I could do what I want, not clean up, slob about and I got to sit on a comfy seat while surfing the t'internet. My dream was then snatched from me like a kid with a Mr Potato Head stolen by the school bullies. I had to come back to my mums 2 days after getting home because the car she bought decided to die on her. Just like her other jeep AND my little car that she broke.

It was clear to see that I was not impressed and after bitching about it I was told "You should feel lucky to be going back to your mums. At least you'll get proper meals." WHAT PIFFLE!! The only reason I get proper cooked meals here is because I end up cooking them. "You'll enjoy yourself at your mums. You always say you do." again...WHAT PIFFLE!! I enjoy myself here when I have transport but because my mum is always working, she has the car. So what do I have to do? I have to sit inside the house that's in the middle of the country and watch after the puppy from hell, I have to feed the chickens from hell and then clean up the house from hell. Where's the fun in that, I ask ya?

I'm going home on tuesday no matter what anyone says. I'm going into see a great movie on wednesday (reviewed a few posts below), I have a hospital appointment I cant miss and I want to sleep in my own bed. Can anyone blame me? Would anyone sue me for wanting to be alone in my own flat, in my own bed, on my own computer and on my comfy chair? NO. NO ONE CAN and if anyone would like to try, I'd say bring it on. Annoying a Scottish girl with no transport is like you sticking a mars bar in your arse and running past a rottweiler, for it then to chase you down the road. That's just asking for trouble

80's Movies

2007-02-25T12:21:00.000Z

I'm not losing the tradition of posting 80's movie clips from youtube. For your past enjoyment I had posted clips of Monster squad, Pump up the Volume (before anyone says anything. I know it was from the 90's but it's very close to the 80's. So hush it!) and just a few days ago I posted Beetlejuice for you all.

This clip now comes from the 1987 movie called Adventures in Babysitting. Written by Chris Columbus and staring Elizabeth Shue, Keith Coogan and Anthony Rapp, this movie focuses on Chris Parker (Shue) being stuck babysitting after her date is canceled. After her friend, Brenda, calls begging to be picked up from the bus station, Chris and the kids head into the city only to be met with car problems and then the problem of staying alive after being caught up in the middle of a mafia deal all because of a Playboy magazine. Full of comedy, chases and teenage crushes, this movie is a great 80's icon movie.

Movie Review - Hot Fuzz

2007-02-24T15:52:00.000Z

Hot Fuzz
Directed by: Edger Wright
Written by: Edger Wright, Simon Pegg
Staring: Simon Pegg, Nick Frost, Bill Nighy and Jim Broadbent
Plotline: Nicholas Angel is the finest cop London has to offer. He's so good, he makes everyone else look bad. As a result, Angel's superiors send him to a place where his talents won't be quite so embarrassing - the sleepy and seemingly crime-free village of Sandford. Once there, he is partnered with the well-meaning but overeager police officer Danny Butterman, who is a huge action movie fan and believes his new big-city partner might just be a real-life "bad boy," and his chance to experience the life of gunfights and car chases he so longs for. As a series of grisly accidents rocks the village, Angel is convinced that Sandford is not what it seems and he's out to clean up the mess.

This movie is made by the same guys who brought us Shaun of the Dead and if you've seen that movie then you'll LOVE Hot Fuzz. This movie is full of laughs, car chases, gunfights and twists. It's a must see for any comedy fan. Simon Pegg and Nick Frost don't disappoint the audience with their acting and comedy skills. There's not one wooden performance. Which makes it all the more watchable because you don't get bored half way through. I thought with the movie being 2 hours long that I would be praying for the end to come. In fact...I was praying for it to never end. I loved it. The only negative thing I can say about the movie is that there's too much of the fast sequence scenes that were made famous in Shaun of the Dead. I felt a few of them werent needed but I didn't let that cloud my judgement on the movie as a whole.

Highly enjoyable and most likely to become a cult success as Shaun of the Dead became. So enjoyable that I'm going into see it for a second time next week!! I'd give this movie a rating of 9/10

80's Movies

2007-02-18T17:07:00.000Z

Just thought I would post a scene from one of my all time favourite movies called Beetlejuice. Made in 1988 and directed by Tim Burton, starring Michael Keaton, Geena Davis, Alec Baldwin and Winona Ryder, this movie keeps you in laughs from start to finish.

It's about a couple who have recently died and their struggle to come to terms with the family from New York who have bought their house and changed everything. They contact a bio-exorcist called Beetlejuice in an attempt to rid their new england farmhouse of the yuppie family, The Deetzs. This is one movie I love Michael Keaton in and it's blasphemy if you've not yet seen it. Watch this clip and then head out to the nearest store that sells dvds and BUY IT! If you dont like my recommendation of the movie, then come back and let me know and I'll eat my e-words. Enjoy

*EDIT on 29th Aug 2007: Vid changed due to other vid no longer being on youtube

An evening with Derek Acorah

2007-02-18T16:38:00.000Z

My Valentines was spent at a show called An evening with Derek Acorah, who happens to be a spirit medium here in the UK. I've never been to a night like this before and I have to say..I was impressed. He got information spot on with everyone he talked with. Just a shame he never had a message for me.

Here is the program that was for sale before the show and afterwards Derek did a signing with anyone who happened to want to wait (tick tock, tick tock) over 30 minutes. I couldn't talk that night. I had lost my voice, which seemed to please a lot of people, so all my talking had to be done by my mother.

I did, however, manage to take my own pictures of him. If no one had gone to a show like this, then you should. I know it's not for everyone but if you believe in spirit mediums, then it's something you'll enjoy. You never know..you might get a message from a loved one who has crossed over.

My only rant about the whole night is the people who happen to go along and either don't answer the medium when he offers information to find the person who the message is for OR for the people who are lucky enough to get a message and just dont seem interested at all. I can't understand why they go if they know there's a chance he could be speaking about your loved one and they say fuck all about it. This happened a lot and it only holds up other people from having the chance of a message.

EDIT:When I said they just dont seem interested at all and wouldn't speak up - There was the women who annoyed Derek (see below)She didn't speak up after him asking her to 3 or 4 times. He was telling her things from this spirit and she was telling him "yes" "maybe" "could be". If that's the case and things arent fitting right, then she should speak up and tell him that it's not fitting right. He would either have offered her more information or tried to find the actual relative that the message is for.
Edit 2:He was calling for someone who might have had a little clue as to who would have been here to send a message. One case of a reading was that he spent 15 minutes trying to find the person who it could have been and no one said anything. Then just as he was about to ask the spirit to leave, someone piped up saying "It's me" Why did it take 15 minutes for them to say it could have been them. He was offering the same information over and over again. Yet it took someone 15 minutes to say that it was them. It was a message from their Dad. It's not like you're going to forget about your own Dad who died just 9 years before.

One women was totally stupid and she annoyed Derek enough that he just gave up. I don't blame him, to be honest. If you're going to pay £15+ for a ticket, then at least put it to good use! I'll be going back for another show if there happens to be one. Might get a message from my Dad or I might not be so lucky at all. It's a 50/50 chance.

The Brits 2007 - The Results

2007-02-15T13:36:00.000Z

This years Brit awards was held at Earls Court in London lastnight. Here are some of the results:-

British Male Solo Artist
WINNER: James Morrison
Jarvis Cocker
Lemar
Paolo Nutini
Thom Yorke

British Female Solo Artist
WINNER: Amy Winehouse
Corinne Bailey Rae
Jamelia
Lily Allen
Nerina Pallot

British Album
WINNER: Arctic Monkeys - Whatever People Say I Am, That's What I'm Not
Amy Winehouse - Back to Black
Lily Allen - Alright Still
Muse - Black Holes & Revelations
Snow Patrol - Eyes Open

British Group
WINNER: Arctic Monkeys
Kasabian
Muse
Razorlight
Snow Patrol

British Single
WINNER: Take That - Patience
The Feeling - Fill My Little World
Razorlight - America
Snow Patrol - Chasing Cars
Will Young - All Time Love

International Male Solo Artist
WINNER: Justin Timberlake
Beck
Bob Dylan
Damien Rice
Jack Johnson

International Female Solo Artist
WINNER: Nelly Furtado
Beyonce
Cat Power
Christina Aguilera
Pink

Outstanding Contribution To Music: Oasis

You can view the rest of the results here

Bafta awards 2007 - The Results

2007-02-12T11:46:00.000Z

The Baftas took place yesterday at the Royal Opera House in London and I thought I would just post the results for people to see (who haven't seen them already). So here you go:-

Best Film:
WINNER: The Queen
Babel
The Last King of Scotland
The Departed
Little Miss Sunshine

Best British Film:
WINNER: The Last King of Scotland
The Queen
Casino Royale
Notes on a Scandal
United 93

Best Actor In A Leading Role:
WINNER: Forest Whitaker - The Last King of Scotland
Daniel Craig - Casino Royale
Leonardo DiCaprio - The Departed
Peter O'Toole - Venus
Richard Griffiths - The History Boys

Best actress in a leading role
WINNER: Dame Helen Mirren - The Queen
Dame Judi Dench - Notes on a Scandal
Kate Winslet - Little Children
Penelope Cruz - Volver
Meryl Streep - The Devil Wears Prada

You can read the rest of the results for the baftas here.

Human rights...my ass!

2007-02-12T11:13:00.000Z

In our local newspaper on saturday there was a front page story about a paedophile named Steven Leisk who murdered a 9 year old in 1997.

Steven Leisk claims his human rights have been broken and now wants a cash payment. He is locked up in Peterhead prison, a victorian jail where the practice is still taking place with chemical toilets. He is one of 1,400 inmates who are making claims against the fact they are made to slop out.

In 1997, Leisk snatched Scott Simpson while he was playing football yards from Leisk's home. He strangled Scott and then dumped his body. 5 days later, little Scott was found. Leisk was jailed for life with the recommendation he serve a minimum of 25 years. But under human rights legislation the punishment was reviewed and cut to 20 years.

In my opinion, they shouldnt have any human rights! Anyone who murders someone has taken away their human rights. So why the hell should they have any?! Let them rot in jail. It's what they deserve. Prisoners seem to have a better life inside a prison than people living a normal life. Am I the only one who thinks that's fucked up? Maybe I'm old fashioned in my thinking but it should be a life for a life. They have taken it upon themselves to end someones life. Why should they carry on living a life they dont deserve?

I do, however, know about the talk of some experts who believe that killers are born to kill. They have been calling for the death penalty to be stopped so they can study these people. I don't know much on that subject because I havent read up about it but maybe that is a good idea. So we get to know and understand the way they think and why they ended up killing people.

That still doesnt stop me thinking that a life for a life is the way it should be. I'm in two minds about it, to be honest. I do think, very strongly, that they shouldnt have any human rights what so ever. Let them slop out, let them rot. It's nothing short of what they deserve.

gay dog?

2007-02-11T00:30:00.000Z

Today, I caught our black lab bitch trying to hump our ridgeback bitch' head. So not a sight I wanted to witness while trying to watch Dancing on Ice and laughing at how pathetic Stephen Gately is at skating.

Not to worry. I told Tilly that we'll still feed her and let her outside dispite her being gay. At least she didnt try to hide it!

Snow snow. everywhere I look...

2007-02-10T11:37:00.000Z

Just thought I would post a picture of the NOT so lovely snow that we have here in Scotland. The level of snow comes up past your ankles. The only ones loving the snow is the dogs! Maybe if I was 10, had a sledge and warmer clothes, I would go sledging down the huge hills behind my mums house. Thank god I'm not 10 anymore. There's no sign of it letting up. I just want it to stop =(

World's worst chat-up lines

2007-02-04T16:16:00.000Z

How many have you used or have been used on you?

-Are you a parking ticket? because you've got fine written all over you
-Do you have a sticking plaster? I just scraped my knee falling for you
-If being sexy was a crime, you'd be guilty as charged
-My lips are registered weapons. Do you feel lucky?
-I'm not really this tall, I'm standing on my wallet
-When God made you he was showing off
-If I could rearrange the alphabet I'd put U and I together
-Now before you run off, I'm not a freak
-There must be something wrong with my eyes. I cant take them off you
-You know what? Your eyes are the same colour as my Porsche
-Do you have a map? Because I just keep getting lost in your eyes
-The thing is, you are ugly but you intrigue me
-Do you have any raisins? No? How about a date?
-I must be in heaven because I'm standing next to you
-If you're going to regret this in the morning, we can sleep until the afternoon
-Hey baby, you've got something on your bum....my eyes
-Can I get a picture of you so I can show Santa what I want or Christmas?
-Can you see my pants? Do you want to?
-Are you as beautiful on the inside as you are on the outside?
-Are you lost? Because heaven's a long way from here
-Are you religious? Good, because I'm the answer to your prayers
-Would you like to be unique and different? Try saying yes
-Aren't you Tony the Tiger on the frosties' box? because you look grrrreat
-Ten-tonne polar bear...now if that doesn't break the ice, nothing will
-Do you believe in love at first sight or should I walk by again?
-Would you take a look at those curves? And here's me with no brakes
-I seem to have lost my phone number - can I have yours?
-Apart from being sexy, what do you do for a living?
-Don't go in that building. The sprinklers will go off
-I'm choking! I need mouth to mouth quick
-Hey, you were great on Baywatch last night
-Good news. The test results have come back negative
-Do you like to dance? Well then, could you go dance so I can talk to your friend?
-Hi. I'm Mr Right. Someone said you might have been looking for me
-You've been a bad, bad girl. Now go to my room!
-Aren't we supposed to get together for a candlelit dinner later tonight?
-Hello, Cupid called. He says to tell you he needs my heart back
-Is there an airport nearby or is that just my heart taking off?
-Is your name Gillette? because you're the best a man can get
-Know what I like best about you, baby? You haven't CS gassed me yet
-Hi, my name is Fred Flintstone and I'm gonna make your bedrock!
-That's a nice shirt. Can I talk you out of it?
-Somebody better call God because he must be missing an angel
-If you were a new burger at McDonald's, you would be a McGorgeous

And the best put-downs:-
-Can I buy you a drink?
Actually, I'd rather have the money
-Didn't we go on a date once? Or was it twice?
Must've been once. I never make the same mistake twice
-How did you get to be so beautiful?
I must have been given your share
-Hey baby, what's your sign?
Do not enter!
-If I could see you naked, I'd die happy
If I saw you naked, I'd die laughing
-Go on, don't be shy. Ask me out
Okay, get out!

No more easter

2007-02-04T11:16:00.000Z

In a saturday newspaper, the headline was that the NHS Health Chiefs are banning easter - to avoid offending Muslims.

NHS Grampian are ruling that the Christian celebration is no longer a public holiday and if staff want this day off, they have to use up their annual leave. They insist the controversial move is because the organisation is multi-cultural - so "can't please everyone"
A stunned Muslim leader of Aberdeen's Muslim community said:-

"Where does all this end? Are they going to ban Christmas next so no one's offended? The NHS have totally lost the plot. I know a lot of Muslim doctors and they'd never want to see colleagues missing out on Easter"

NHS Grampian insisted there was no chance of Easter being re-instated.

People turn their nose up at you for saying "Merry Christmas" because it 'should' now be "Happy Holidays". Does that now mean that not long from now, Chritsmas will be canceled? Families wont be able to spend the day together because you have to work on Christmas day? Will things get so out of hand that the whole Christmas idea will be binned? "You cant buy christmas presents. It offends someone of another culture"
I'm not Chritian but I'm shocked at the whole principle of the matter. What's so offending about Easter? Why should Christians lose out on a holiday that's been celebrated since the second century AD?

We're a country of different races and religions. We've lived like this for years. People of the Muslim community don't have a problem with us celebrating different holidays (as stated above). So why is it now a problem? The answer...

We're making it a problem! I'm not talking about you and me. I'm talking about the people in a position to force these changes. The people in Health Care, Education and Government.
Were the general public ever given the choice to voice their opinion on these situations? I know I wasnt! Were you? Were the Muslim community given a chance to voice their opinions? I'm guessing not because a majority of Muslims don't care that Christians celebrate Easter. These people in power are causing a divide between people of different faiths. They are the ones making it a problem. Not us. It's about time that we were asked what WE want. Not being told what these people think is the best way.
People wonder why it seems that we can't all live together. Is this a big example of a real reason? and why are people so scared to point out the whole fucked up government that leads us?

I don't care who celebrates what holiday. Be it Easter or Ramadan. It's your faith and you are well within your rights to celebrate them. NO ONE should be allowed to tell you what you can and cant celebrate. This is a perfect example of how our country is another step closer to being completely fucked up!

Hot Fuzz

2007-01-28T01:51:00.000Z

There's a new movie coming out called Hot Fuzz. It's a comedy by the same people who brought us Shaun of the Dead. It opens in the UK on Feb 14th, starring Simon Pegg and Nick Frost, and I know I cant wait to see it!!

If you've seen Shaun of the Dead, and loved it as I did, then you're bound to want to watch this movie. Click here to visit the offical website for trailers and all sorts!

Malika

2007-01-28T00:07:00.000Z

Today, my mother and I went to purchase a new puppy and here she is. This is Malika, a Rhodesian Ridgeback. She's 11 weeks old and she was one of two puppies left in the litter. That takes the total of ridgebacks in our household to 3 and the total to 4 dogs all in all. We're running out of space and my mum told me she wants MORE dogs. I don't think I can handle another dog!

Dear Alcohol

2007-01-24T18:09:00.000Z

Dear Alcohol,

First & foremost, let me tell you that I'm a huge fan of yours. As my friend, you always seem to be there when needed. The perfect post-work cocktail, a beer at the game, and you're even around in the holidays, hidden inside chocolates as you warm us when we're stuck in the midst of endless family gatherings. However, lately I've been wondering about your intentions. While I want to believe that you have my best interests at heart, I feel that your influence has led to some unwise consequences:

1. Phone calls: While I agree with you that communication is important, I question the suggestion that any conversation of substance or necessity takes place after 2 a.m. Why would you make me call those ex-boyfriends/girlfriends when I know for a fact they do not want to hear from me during the day, let alone all hours of the night?

2. Eating: Now, you know I love a good meal, but why do you suggest that I eat a taco with chili sauce, along with a big Italian meatball and some stale chips (washed down with WINE & topped off with a Kit Kat after a few cheese curls & chili cheese fries)? I'm an eclectic eater, but I think you went too far this time.

3. Clumsiness: Unless you're subtly trying to tell me that I need to do more yoga to improve my balance, I see NO need to hammer the issue home by causing me to fall down. It's completely unnecessary, and the black & blue marks that appear on my body mysteriously the next day are beyond me. Similarly, it should never take me more than 45 seconds to get the front door key into the lock.

4. Furthermore: The hangovers have GOT to stop. This is getting ridiculous. I know a little penance for our previous evening's debauchery may be in order, but the 3pm hangover immobility is completely unacceptable. My entire day is shot. I ask that, if the proper precautions are taken (water, vitamin B, bread products, aspirin) prior to going to sleep/passing out face down on the kitchen floor with a bag of popcorn, the hangover should be minimal & in no way interfere with my daily activities.

5. The "hook-up." Need I say more?

Alcohol, I have enjoyed our friendship for some years now & would like to ensure that we remain on good terms. You've been the invoker of great stories, the provocation for much laughter, and the needed companion when I just don't know what to do with the extra money in my pockets. In order to continue this friendship, I ask that you carefully review my grievances above & address them immediately. I will look for an answer no later than Thursday 3pm (pre-happy hour) on your possible solutions & hopefully we can continue this fruitful partnership.

Thank you,
Your biggest fan

P.S.
THINGS THAT ARE DIFFICULT TO SAY WHEN DRUNK:
1. Innovative
2. Preliminary
3. Proliferation
4. Cinnamon

THINGS THAT ARE VERY DIFFICULT TO SAY WHEN DRUNK:
1. Specificity
2. British Constitution
3. Passive-aggressive disorder

THINGS THAT ARE DOWNRIGHT IMPOSSIBLE TO SAY WHEN DRUNK:
1. Thanks, but I don't want to have sex.
2. Nope, no more beer for me.
3. Sorry, but you're not really my type.
4. Good evening, officer. Isn't it lovely out tonight?
5. Oh, I couldn't. No one wants to hear me sing.

Sleepless in the country

2007-01-22T02:01:00.000Z

It's 2am right now and I cant sleep. I'm even typing worse than I normally do and that's saying something. It's a times like these that us Scottish people would say "My head is up my arse" I feel spaced out, seriously!

I decided to have a look at the blog stats and was a little shocked and concerned at what I found. Under the 'keywords' section, someone had used "find a babysitter on myspace"....I have 2 questions about this find:-

1)Who in their right mind would be looking for babysitters on myspace? Wouldnt they just use a phonebook, or word of mouth, to find one? I know I would! DOODS, don't use myspace to find babysitters. WTF?
2) Why the hell were they directed here for that information?!??!!?!!?!?

I feel that these 2 questions may never be answered with correct information. I thought I was seeing things through my 'head up my arse' moment. They were directed here by google. So now I'm on a mission to find out whats on google when those words are typed in. I don't think I'll be able to sleep until I find out for myself.

Celebrity Big Brother UK

2007-01-19T16:35:00.000Z

This past week has seen Celebrity Big Brother UK hit news headlines across the world. It's been talked about by politicians and the public because of the seemingly racist remarks made towards a housemate, Bollywood actress Shilpa Shetty.

It all started when some celebrities, Jade Goody (famous for appearing in Big Brother 3), Danielle Lloyd (a former Miss Great Britain), Jo O'Meara (former singer from the pop group S Club 7) and Jade's 'none celebrity in my eyes' boyfriend Jack Tweedy, started talking about Shilpa and making a joke out of her. Jade's mother (Jackiey) first brought it to a head by failing to pronounce Shilpa's name correctly and started called her "The Indian" and "Princess". Since then, things have gone downhill and Goody and Co have formed a group who seem to spend most of their time talking about Shilpa and mimicking her voice. Other housemates realise there's a problem and have done their best to try and calm things down. Some housemates have even been in tears because of the amount of bullying they see around them.

They have passed comments about how she used her hands to touch food, which prompted Danielle to say "You don't know where those hands have been". When she poured the left-over chicken soup down the toilet, they made a comment that there could have been chicken bones in there and it could cause a blockage. Jack then suggested that Shilpa "pick them out with her teeth" to which she replied "There's a lot more I would rather do with my teeth"
Shilpa has been reduced to tears a lot but she told Big Brother that she didnt feel the bullying was meant in any racist way. The public dont agree and thousands of people have complained about the goings on. Big Brother's sponsor, The Carphone Warehouse, have let it be known that they no longer wish to sponsor the show and will withdraw after the show finishes. Jade's perfume line has been removed from some stores because they feel she is being racist and a contract for Danielle had been removed too.
Tonight, both Jade and Shilpa are up for eviction and one daily newspaper are calling for all their readers to vote to evict Jade. Big Brother have also said that tonights eviction will be without the usual crowd of fans waiting for the evicted housemate to leave.

I've been watching every day and I do feel that what they are doing isnt called for at all. I can understand that not everyone can get along and I'm just wondering if there would be so much of a uproar if they were bullying someone of the same race as them. Will this be the kick people need to recognize what bullying actually is? For years thousands of kids have been subject to bullying. I use to be one of them, as I'm sure some people reading this were too. 100's of kids couldnt take it anymore and ended up taking their lives. Will this stop people burying their heads in the sand, and make them sit up and do something about it? To be honest, I highly doubt it. After a while, it will all be forgotten. Like everything seems to be these days. It's a shame that we cant all exist together as mixed race people. All races are to blame. Sorry for saying that because I know there are a lot of good people out there but we have to see it for the way it is. We have to sit up and pay attention and try and do something about it. Starting a war isnt the answer either (although it seems to be for people in power). I don't know the answer. I wish I did.

You can read the story here and there is also links on that page to read past stories about this whole situation.

Man and Baby poster

2007-01-19T15:43:00.000Z

Who would have thought that the above poster would have adorned 5 million walls since it's release in the 1980's. This poster was considered to cheesy to be art but in 2007 it's considered a collector's item, and yesterday a limited edition print from the posters original negative fetched £2,400 at auction.

The poster that came to be considered the ideal of the "New Man" wasnt without it's share of lies, addiction and tragedy. What people didnt know about was that it was thought up by a gay guy, who later died of AIDS, was shot by a guy who ended up with a drug addiction due to the money he earned, and starred a guy who ended up sleeping with over 3,000 girls.

The poster was created by the Athena chain of art shops after the company's art director, Paul Rodriguez, came up with the idea. The photographer, Spencer Rowell, took the pictures and it was shoot in London in 1986 and took all of 20 minutes to shoot. The model used was Adam Perry, who went on to become a highly sought supermodel. The baby was named Stelios Havatzias, who now lives in Cyprus with his family.
Paul Rodriguez was diagnosed HIV positive and died from AIDS in 1993. Spencer Rowell went on to make thousands after refusing a one off payment and settled for taking 10% of the profit made from selling the poster. He used the huge cheques to fund a lavish lifestyle, which unfortunately also developed him a drug addiction. In 1994 he declared himself bust. Adam Perry was once described as the "worlds most promiscuous man" by GQ magazine. He used his notoriety as a pin-up to bed 3,000 women but financially for him the poster deal was a disaster. He had his fee reduced on the day of the shoot because he turned up with a sunburnt chest. He is now setting up a multimedia business.
The Athena chain didnt escape the curse of the poster and eventually went into receivership. In 1995 all but a few of its 157 store closed down. The only person not to have suffered any curse is Stelios Havatzias. In 2004 he was traced to his family home in Cyprus, where he lives a normal teenage life. He did say that he was only paid £32 for the whole shoot and his family werent even given a copy of the poster. They had to buy it themselves.

With me being only 7 when this poster was created, I didnt see the hype that it caused. Once I hit the age of 15 I wanted a copy of the poster for my wall but never managed to fullfil that dream. These days, I'm going to settle for it now being on my blog.

Doctor visit: update

2007-01-17T17:18:00.000Z

Today I went for more blood samples for my on-going testing for PCOS. I asked the nurse what my file said about my last set of results and she told me that I had a low level of the hormone SHBG (Sex hormone binding globulin) and the doctor wanted that tested again and also for other things.

Once home, I went searching to see just what this hormone is and found that conditions with low SHBG include polycystic ovary syndrome, diabetes, and hypothyroidism. I'm guessing that it's more than likely that I do have PCOS. What didnt help was me then reading more into the syndrome and seeing...

heavy bleeding is also an early warning sign of endometrial cancer, for which women with PCOS are at higher risk

...for the past few months, I've suffered from heavy bleeding. Like my mum said to me (while I was sobbing my heart out on the phone) is that it might never come to that or maybe I dont have PCOS and I'm reading too much into things. I guess I'll find out for sure in another 3 weeks time.

Now to something about waiting for blood tests. It came to my attention that some people had been coming to this blog and had been referred here from another blog. NHS Blog Doctor happened to pass by here and had read my post about not being happy at waiting 3 weeks for test results.
I'm sure I'm not alone in thinking that 3 weeks is a long time to wait. I said in my post that I thought it typical of the NHS to take so long. I know for a fact that I'm not alone in thinking THAT. It's hard to have 100% faith in the NHS. They told my dad that all he had was an ulcer and then 3 months later, another doctor told my dad that he had cancer. Maybe I'm biassed because it was my dad but to me, they should have done more tests to rule out everything. Not just settle for "Oh. It must be an ulcer"

Do the non-private medical care people of the UK expect to much from the National Health Service? You hear so many horror stories in the papers about our health care that it can be hard to have faith in it.
The only thing I strongly disagree with is that the NHS 24 helpline isnt helpful at all. I've found it extremely helpful everytime I've called. They helped me when I couldnt breath right and told me that it was most likely bronchitis, they helped me again when I called about my gran and although saying I would have to wait for 3 hours for the out of hours doctor to arrive, the nurse made sure a doctor arrived an hour later and that's when we were told my gran had had a mini stroke. I'm just one of the millions of british people who dont have 100% faith in their health care. Who can really say I'm not right in thinking this? (apart from an NHS doctor).
In saying that I don't have faith in them anymore isnt a correct statement on my part, to be honest. I had faith in my original doctors. They were the ones to point out my mental health problem and my eating disorder. My faith lowered when I was moved to this new doctor surgery because my original doctor moved and because of where I stayed, I couldnt visit them anymore. There's no doubt in my mind that some NHS doctors are excellent. I just think mine aint all that great.

Writers block

2007-01-17T01:44:00.000Z

6 times now I've deleted a post because I cant get the words typed out right. Reading it back, Ive hated every word. For days I've been thinking of something to post on the blog and for the life of me...I cant think of jack shit!

I dont want to go down my usual route of bitching about my gran or my neighbours. I'd actually like to make a post that's worth while to the people reading. Something so interesting that people will leave comments about it and not just wait for the blog explosion count down to finish to get away from the unsightly posts I've posted in the past. Do muses come cheap?.....10 minutes have gone by and all I've done is stare at what I've just typed out...trying to think of what next to say

FUCK, SHIT, ASS, BITCH, WANK!!!!!

No. That didnt help either...another 10 minutes has gone by. The only slightly none interesting thing I can type about it...listening to Rob play the guitar by means of the .wav files he's sending me. I'm looking at a very useless post and watching a very useless live stream of Celebrity Big Brother (UK)...what have my nights come to? Bugger it. I'm going to watch the rest of the Ugly Betty episodes. What a life, eh?

Brush up your English!

2007-01-15T06:19:00.000Z

FUCK

Our most versatile word. By its stress and inflection it can describe many emotions. It can be used as a noun (I don't give a fuck), as an objective (It's fucked), as a verb in its transitive form (The game was fucked because of the weather), and in its intransitive form (Well, I'll be fucked), in the present tense (I'm fucked), in the past tense (I was fucked). Many everyday expressions show its true versatility.

DENIAL: I didn't fucking do it.
PERPLEXITY: I know fuck all about it.
APATHY: Who gives a fuck.
GREETINGS: How the fuck are you?
RESIGNATION: Oh fuck it.
DERISION: He fucks everything up.
SUSPICION: Who the fuck are you?
PANIC: Let's get the fuck out of here.
DIRECTIONS: Fuck off.
DISBELIEF: How the fuck did you do that?

The word has been used throughout history by many famous people. Some of the more notable quotations are:

What the fuck was that? The Mayor of Hiroshima
Look at all those fucking Indians. General Custer
Where's the fucking water coming from? Captain of the Titanic
That's not a real fucking gun. John Lennon
The fucking throttle's stuck. Donald Campbell
Who's going to fucking know? President Nixon
Heads are going to fucking roll. Ann Boelyn
Who let the fucking woman drive? Captain of the Space Shuttle
I thought I could smell fucking petrol. Nikki Lauda
Any fucker can understand that. Einstein
It fucking looks like her. Picasso
Where the fuck are we? Christopher Columbus
I'm forever blowing fucking Bubbles. Michael Jackson
How the fuck do you work that out? Pythagorus
You want WHAT on the fucking ceiling? Michaelangelo
Fuck a duck. Walt Disney
Why? Because it's fucking there. Sir Edmund Hilary
I don't suppose it's fucking raining...Joan of Arc
I haven't got a fucking clue. Miss Marple
Scattered showers, my fucking arse. Noah

Notice To All Staff Regarding Language

2007-01-15T06:01:00.000Z

It has been brought to our attention that some individuals have been using foul language during the execution of their duties. Due to complaints from some employees who are more easily offended, this type of language will no longer be tolerated.
However, we do realise the importance of staff being able to express properly their feelings when communicating with other employees. With this in mind, the Communications and Planning Department has compiled a list of code phrase replacements so that the proper exchange of ideas and information can continue in an effective manner without risking offense to our more sensitive co-workers.

The old phrase will be in bold, the new phrase in italics.

No fucking way - I'm fairly sure that's feasable
You're fucking kidding me - Really
Tell someone who gives a fuck - Have you run that by.....?
No prick told me - I wasn't involved in this project
Who fucking cares - Are you sure that's a problem?
Eat shit and die - You don't say
Eat shit and die, motherfucker - You don't say, Sir.
Kiss my arse - So, you'd like me to help you?
He's a fucking prick - He's somewhat insensitive
She's a ball busting bitch - She's an agressive go-getter
You haven't a fucking clue - You could use some more training
This place is fucked - We're a little disorganised today
What sort of fuckwit are you? - You're new here, aren't you?
Fuck off, shithead - Well, there you go
You're a fucking wanker - You're my supervisor and I respect you
Ha, suck eggs - I wasn't there that day
You're fucking paranoid - So, you're from Sydney
You're fucking useless - So, you're from Melbourne
Fuck off - I'll look into it and get back to you
Fuck off, you dickhead - I no longer require your assistance
How do you get this piece of shit to work - I can't use the photocopier
You fucking loser - Gee, that was unfortunate

Dieting Under Stress

2007-01-15T05:51:00.001Z

This diet was designed to help you cope with the stress that builds up during the day, especially when you have to work.

BREAKFAST
1/2 grapefruit
1 slice of wholemeal toast, dry
1/2 glass skim milk

LUNCH
1 small lean chicken breast, grilled
1 cup steamed spinach
1 cup herbal tea
1 Tim Tam

MID AFTERNOON SNACK
Rest of the Tim Tams in the packet
2 litres of Rocky Road ice cream
1 jar hot chocolate fudge
Nuts, cherries, whipped cream

DINNER
2 loaves garlic bread with cheese
Large pepperoni, mushroom and cheese pizza
4 cans or 1 large jug beer
3 Milky Way chocolate bars

LATE EVENING NEWS
Entire frozen Sara Lee cheesecake eaten straight from the freezer.

RULES FOR THIS DIET:
1. If you eat something and no one sees you eat it, it has no calories.
2. If you drink a Diet Coke with a chocolate, the calories in the chocolate are cancelled out by the Diet Coke.
3. When you eat with someone else, calories do not count if you do not eat more than they do.
4. Food used for medicinal purposes NEVER counts, such as hot chocolate, brandy, toast and Sara Lee cheesecakes.
5. If you fatten up everyone else around you then you look thinner.
6. Movie related foods do not have additional calories because they are part of the entire entertainment package and not part of one's personal fuel, such as Jaffa's, Mars Bars, Smarties, etc.
7. Biscuit pieces have no calories, the process of breaking up the biscuit causes calorie leakage.
8. Things licked off knives and spoons have no calories if you are in the process of making something. Examples are peanut butter on a knife while making a sandwich and ice cream on a spoon.
9. Foods that have the same colour have the same calorie value. Examples are spinach and pistachio ice cream, mushrooms and white chocolate.

The American Indian

2007-01-15T05:30:00.000Z

(I've updated this one)

Barbara Walters was doing a 20/20 special on the American Indians.
She was interviewing Indians on a reservation, her escort was a brave with ONE feather in his head-dress. She asked him why he had only one feather. "Me only have one squaw, so me only have one feather" he answered.
Feeling that he might be joking, she asked a brave who had FOUR feathers in his head-dress, and he replied "Me sleep with four squaws, that's why me have four feathers".
Ms Walters was not convinced, so she asked the Chief, who had a head-dress full of feathers. The Chief proudly pounded his chest and said, "Me Chief! Me fuck 'em all - big, fat, short and tall, me fuck 'em all!"
Horrified, Ms Walters exclaimed, "You ought to be hung!"
"You damn right me hung! Big like buffalo, long like snake." he retorted.
Ms Walters cried, "You don't have to be hostile."
"Hoss style, dog style, wolf style, me fuck 'em all!" he commented.
With tears in her eyes, Ms Walters sobbed, "Oh dear."
The Chief looked shocked. "No deer! No fuck 'em deer! Asshole too high and fuckers run too fast. No fuck deer!"

REVENGE OF THE BLONDES

2007-01-15T05:24:00.000Z

The only problem with women is men.
Women like the simple things in life - like men.
Boys will be boys, but one day all girls will be women.
When a woman makes a fool of a man, it's usually an improvement.
Most men prefer looks to brains, because most men see better than they think.
I only wanted to have a child, not marry one.
The trouble with some women is that they get all excited about nothing, then they marry him.
What's the difference between men and pigs?
Pigs don't turn into men when they're drunk.
The average man is proof that women can take a joke.
Boys will be boys, but men are better at it.
What do you call a man who has lost 98% of his brain?
A widower.
They put one man on the moon. Why can't they put them all there?
What's an orgasm, Mum?
I don't know, luv. Ask your father.
If you catch a man, throw him back.
What do you call 500 men at the bottom of the sea?
A good start.
Men call us "birds". Is that because of all the worms we pick up?
Every man has it in his power to make one woman happy, by remaining a bachelor.
What is the useless bit of skin on the end of a penis called?
A man.

That Christmas Spirit

2007-01-15T05:17:00.000Z

You'll need a cup of water, a cup of sugar, four large eggs, 2 cups of dried fruit, a teaspoon of baking soda, a teaspoon of salt, a cup of brown sugar, lemon juice, nuts and a bottle of whisky. Sample the whisky to check for quality.

Take a large bowl. Check the whisky again to be sure it is of the highest quality: pour one level cup and drink - repeat.

Turn on the electric mixer. Beat one cup of butter in a large fluffy bowl. Add one spoontea of sugar and beat again.

Make sure the whisky is still OK. Cry another tup.

Turn off the mixer. Break two leggs and adddd to the bowl and chick in the cup of dried friut, mix on the turner. If the fruit gets stuck in the beaters, pry it loose with a drewscriber. Sample the whisky again to check for tonsisticity.

Next sift two cups of salt, or something. Who cares? Check the whisky.

Now sift the lemon juice and check your nuts. Add one babblespoon of drown sugar, or whatever colour you find. Wix mell. Greasse the oven. Turn the cake pan to 350 gredees.

Don't forget to beat off the turner. Throw the bowl out of the window, check the whisky again and go to bed.

Whonny Jalker

Funny what you find...

2007-01-15T05:12:00.000Z

I was searching thru my books yesterday, looking for a jam and pickle recipe book that I'm sure I have, but I can't seem to find. Anyway, before the popularity of the Internet came about, amusing pictures and stories would be faxed around amongst friends, and I came upon some of these that I had saved and forgotten about. So I shall post them, I hope you get a good laugh out of them, some of them are probably still doing the rounds, so I apologise in advance if you've already seen them. Enjoy!

24 Season 6 Leaked episodes

2007-01-10T05:29:00.000Z

It came to my attention a few days ago that 4 of the new episodes of season 6 of 24 were leaked. That's when every 24 fan started going crazy and downloading them. For days Ive been upset that I couldnt download them. So today I went on the hunt for a website that would allow me to watch the episodes without having to download them (I also found a site that would allow me to watch Lost this way)...

After much searching, I came across a site that answered all my prayers!

For the past 4 hours, I've sat and watched the single most fucking amazing thing in this world. Take my word for it..this season of 24 is a must watch for anyone. Episode 4 is the best episode of 24 I have ever watched and I've watched them all! If that episode is anything to go by, then the rest of the season is going to beat everything they've ever made so far. I'm not going to link the site on here. For my own reasons and because I was asked not to but if anyone reading this wants the link to the website, then please send me a message and I will gladly help you out. I believe its 3 more days till 24 airs in the states and the UK wont be all that far behind in showing this season on Sky One. If you're like me and dont have Sky, then this site will help solve that problem. I'm hoping that it will update with new episodes as they hit the states.

I just have to say this again...ITS FUCKING AMAZING!

Doctor update

2007-01-08T22:51:00.000Z

A little update from my last post....The doctor finally called me and told me that they found a high level of a certain hormone and that they need to test my blood again and this time, there will be blood taken for about 5 other tests. I've got about another 3 week wait for those results. They said the results didnt come back conclusive that it is PCOS. That's why more tests are needed. Until then, they are putting me in contact with a specialist unit at the local hospital and I know what will happen. There will end up being a waiting list for this unit too. Probably about a month or 2. It's just typical!

3 weeks for blood results

2007-01-08T17:03:00.000Z

I don't know if anyone has ever had to wait 3 weeks to get blood test results back (resluts and this is for Luna to laugh at) but that's what I've had to do. I had two blood samples taken on the 22nd Dec. One to test to see if I was anemic and the other was to test for PCOS (Polycystic ovarian syndrome). The anemic result came back the week after, which said I wasnt anemic. Which I kind of knew because I gave blood the week before and if I were anemic, then my iron count would have been spotted then. Today, as you all know, is the 8th January 2007 and so far today I've been on the phone to the doctors 4 times. I've complained and one woman I talked with has taken it upon herself to make damn sure that I find out the results today. I'm waiting for the doctor to call me as I type this.

I've never had to wait this long to get any test result in my life. I suppose you could say this is typical of the National Health Service (NHS) in the UK. I can understand that over the christmas period it is hard to get test completed. People who do this have a life too, and I'm not even laying the blame fully on them. Most of the blame I'm placing on my doctors. I called on friday afternoon and I was told the results were back but the doctor still needed to look at them. I was told to call back in the afternoon, which I did and was told again that the doctor hadn't looked at the results. I was told to call on monday..which brings us to today.

I called in the morning only to be told that the doctor still hadnt looked at the results. I called again at 3pm and was told the same again. That's when I snapped and in the end, the woman on the other end of the phone took pity in me. True to her word, she passed messages onto the doctor and I'm awaiting this phone call.

For 3 weeks I've been worried over this whole PCOS thing. I've been trying my best to put it to the back of my mind but every now and then it pops into my head. Fingers crossed that this phonecall will be a good one but although it could be good, it can also be bad because that means they still don't have a clue what is wrong with me. Lets hope today gets the ball rolling again and faster this time!

Book Review

2007-01-08T00:52:00.000Z

Most people outside the UK most likely wont know who Peter Kay is..well I'm here to tell you all about the comedian from Bolton, UK. He has written an autobiography of his life and people will be surprised to learn that its not your usual "..and this horrid thing happened in my life" or "I came to the end of the road and had to be picked up by...." Not that usual stuff (although I'm not saying those types of autobiographies are not worth reading. I've read a few in my time and enjoyed them as much as Peter Kay's book, and I own a few)

Peter Kay centers more on the funny sides of his life. There are a few death stories mentioned but all are talked about in the happier times of that persons life or by talking about the Right Said Fred tune his dog died to. This autobiography kept me in laughs all the way through. He talks about all the jobs he was fired from, the reasons, the funny sides to all his jobs and how a lie on an application form for University finally helped him become the comedian he is today. I highly recommend this book to everyone. Even people outside the UK. I'm sure anyone will laugh at his life story. I give this a rating of 9/10. I'll be re-reading this again once I've read through the 7 James Patterson books I got for christmas !!

2007

2007-01-04T16:40:00.000Z

A new year has begun and I'm sure most of us are all picking our new years resolutions....

NOT I. Oh no. Not I.

For I have decided that it's not worth my time to sit and decide all my resolutions. I'm refuse to put myself through a night of talking/arguing with myself for something that I know I wont stick to. How many people can say they've actually stuck with a new years resolution they've made? Maybe only a handful of people?

Thou shall not fuck up your life anymore than you already have !!

Bugger that. I'll let my life be mapped out without another voice in my head saying "NOOOOOOOOOOOO. NOT THAT WAY!"

Good luck to everyone who has set resolutions. I hope you manage to stick with them and they all work out for you. I will be sitting eating all the wrong things, smoking all the wrong things and drinking all the wrong things. As the song goes..."that's life!"

A birthday message !!

2007-01-02T22:23:00.000Z

HAPPY BIRTHDAY LUNA!!!!!!!

I'm sorry this message is late too. I hope you had a wonderful day and that you have many more to come!

You don't know this but I'm sending loads of love your way :p Thank you for being who you are and for being there for me...and listening to me bitch and moan..and for everything you have given me. You're one in a million and I feel so lucky to have you as a friend! Much love, sweetie!! <3 <3

A late message !

2007-01-02T22:22:00.001Z

Happy New Year everyone!!!!

Hope you all had a good time

Wanted Christmas Presents

2006-12-26T21:15:00.000Z

It doesnt happen very often but this year, I was given christmas presents I actually wanted!

The first present is a digital camera.
The Fuji Finepix S5600

Bought to me by my mother. I've hinted enough for a digital camera. I wanted to start getting back into photography and this camera will do just nicely!
Just a little list of specs...

Key Features
Image Sensor Type CCD
Resolution 5.1 Megapixel
Optical Zoom 10x
Camera Type Standard Point and Shoot
Lens
Interchangeable Lens Not Interchangeable Lenses
Optical Zoom 10x
35mm Zoom Lens 38 - 380 mm
Digital Zoom 5.7x
Focus Type Autofocus & Fixed Focus & Manual
Focus Range 35.43 in. to Infinity (w) / 78.74 in. to Infinity (t)
Macro Focus Range 3.94 - 78.74 in. (w) / 35.43 - 78.74 in. (t)
Focal Length 6.4 - 64 mm
Image Quality
Camera Resolution 5.1 Megapixel
Video
Video Resolutions 320 x 240 (QVGA), 640 x 480 (VGA)
Video Speed 30 fps
Video Format AVI
Storage
Memory Type xD Picture Card
Compression Type JPEG, Raw Image
Flash
ISO Speeds 100, 1600, 200, 400, 64, 800, Auto
Flash Type Built-In
Flash Functions Auto Flash, Fill-in Flash, Flash Off, Red-eye Reduction Flash, Slow Sync
Viewfinder / Display
Viewfinder Digital
LCD Panel With LCD Panel
LCD Panel Size 1.8 in.
LCD Screen Resolution 115,000 pixels
LCD Protected Position Without LCD Protected Position
Included Features
Self Timer 10 Sec., 2 Sec.
Built-in Microphone With Built-in Microphone
Tripod Mount With Tripod Mount
Dimensions
Height 8.4 cm
Width 11.4 cm
Depth 11.2 cm
Weight 0.4 kg
Miscellaneous
Included Accessories 16 MB Memory Card, 4 x AA Batteries, Lens Cap, Shoulder Strap, Software, Strap, USB Cable, Video Cable
Release Date October, 2005

The second gift is a Logitech X-230 speaker system for my comp

Specs...
-32-watt RMS stereo speakers with FDD2" technology for PCs and CD/MP3 players
-FDD2" dual driver satellite technology produces a uniform soundfield for full, rich sound
-Dynamic, real-time bass equalisation maximises bass response while minimising distortion
-Ported subwoofer design displaces more air for deeper bass
-Headphone jack enables private listening
-Master volume & subwoofer level controls placed for quick, convenient access
-Satellite speaker stands rotate for easy wall-mounting
-Windows® or Macintosh®
-2-year guarantee
-Full product support

I got loads more presents but these are two of the biggest ones. I'm very happy. I'll be having hours of fun with my new camera and the speakers? It'll be so good to not have to wear headphones, like I have done for months now.
The very next thing I'm about to do? Watch 24 season 5 on the computer with the new speakers! Jack Bauer/Kiefer Sutherland's voice is going to be all that more hot.

A Festive Message

2006-12-22T02:15:00.000Z

I would just like to say, on behalf of us all at Online Storm, a very Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year to one and all!

Hope you all have a great day!

Mount Hood PORTLAND, Ore Rescue search UPDATE to Recovery Effort

2006-12-21T10:25:00.000Z

Officials call off search for Mount Hood men

Sheriff gives up hope of finding climbers alive; mission a ‘recovery effort’

PORTLAND, Ore. - Rescue teams gave up any hope of finding two missing climbers alive on stormy Mount Hood and abandoned their frustrating, 9-day-old search Wednesday.

“We’ve done everything we can at this point,” said Sheriff Joe Wampler, choking back tears after returning from one last, fruitless flyover of the 11,239-foot peak.

Wampler said the men’s families made the decision to end the search as yet another snowstorm barreled in.

“It was pretty much their conclusion. The chance of survival is pretty nil. I don’t think I can justify putting any more people in the field with the hope of finding them alive,” the sheriff said.

He said the operation was now a “recovery effort.”

Three climbers in all were reported missing in the snow on Mount Hood on Dec. 11. One of them, 48-year-old Dallas landscape architect Kelly James, was found dead in a snow cave on Monday. Volunteers continued scouring the mountains for signs of James’ climbing partners, Brian Hall, 37, and Jerry “Nikko” Cooke, 36. But climbing gear found on the peak suggested the two may have been swept to their deaths.

My thoughts

It don't look good anymore 9 days in that tempeture and snow lost Gear found, looks like the last two won't be found alive My condolances to there families, hope they can at least find the bodies if they did not survive so it can be finalised and they can start Funeral arrangments

more about this story at here

Mount Hood PORTLAND, Ore Rescue search 1 found dead 2 still missing

2006-12-20T17:57:00.000Z

Mount Hood search on hold due to weather

PORTLAND, Ore. - Rainy weather began moving in around Mount Hood on Wednesday, and rescue teams searching for two missing climbers were forced to remain on standby, at least temporarily.

Though the chances of finding the men had been diminishing rapidly, the sister of one of them said she hadn’t given up hope.

The National Weather Service issued a warning of snow and freezing rain most of the day in the Columbia River Gorge, which the mountain overlooks.

Search leaders said they hoped to put planes in the air and had an avalanche team on standby, but no search operations were under way as of 8:30 a.m. PT, said Hood River County sheriff’s Deputy Matt English.

“It’s really hard to commit because of the weather,” English said. He said rain was beginning in the area around the mountain. Forecasters said heavier weather was expected later in the day.

Climbers Brian Hall and Jerry “Nikko” Cooke have been on Mount Hood for 12 days. A third climber, 48-year-old Kelly James, was found dead Sunday.

My thoughts:

This search has gone on for days My prayers are there for there family, one was found dead sadly there is still hope for the other two missing people

for more info here is the link More on the search on Mount Hood

Reason to watch

2006-12-13T18:02:00.000Z

Yes, it's back. The reason to watch section and today I'm listing Scott Maslen as a reason to watch a TV show. Scott Maslen appears on the TV screen in the UK, staring in the number one police show The Bill. He plays the part of Detective Sergeant Phil Hunter. A real women charmer and dodgy cop.

It's easy to see why he's the number one reason (in my opinion) the watch The Bill. Sexy as all hell. He rates 8/10 for me!

2 more bodies found

2006-12-12T21:06:00.000Z

The case of missing/dead prostitutes in Suffolk, UK has taken another twist.

So far, 3 bodies have been found and today 2 more bodies were found. That's bumped the total up to 5 dead prostitutes. Police are saying that these 2 new bodies could be those of missing women Paula Clennell (24) and Annette Nicholls (29). They've been missing since sunday.

You can read the story here.

These killings are happening very fast. Hardly any break inbetween them and I heard somewhere that police think there could be 2 killers working together. I don't know if that's true but if you think about it, its possible. That would explain the speed in which the girls are going missing and being killed. Each body has been found naked. The first 2 girls were found near water and the 3rd was found near a railway line. These two bodies have been found on woodland.

The police have urged prostitutes to stay off the streets but in my opinion..I dont think most of them will listen to the advice. Most prostitutes are drug addicts. They work the streets to get the cash to feed their habits. This we all know. Who can safely say that they'll listen to that advice? Buisness probably wont be all that great, with people staying away from the redlight area but that still wont stop the women risking their lives for a fix. Only time will tell if more bodies show up. So far, no women have been reported missing.

We can only hope they catch the person/s responsable for these killings.

Blood Donation

2006-12-12T20:34:00.000Z

Today, after a rush last minute decision, I agreed to go with my friend, Susan, to give blood for the second time in my life.

I was lacking in my attempts to make sure I gave blood regular. Nurse told me it was nearly 2 years since I last donated. I got my free badge for donating. Chuffed, is me. I'm scared of needles but once you've got passed that horrid needle part, it's no problem at all. So everyone should head out to your nearest blood donation center and give up a pint of your blood. You'll feel good with yourself if you do.

Not a lot of people actually give blood these days. So many people need your blood to survive. So please look into giving blood. Your good deed will help saves lives.

Just A Little Joke

2006-12-11T21:17:00.000Z

I dont normally care for bulletins on myspace. I hardly pay attention to most of them and I only ever post a few. I found this in a bulletin and just thought I had to post it for everyone to see. So Enjoy!

A family is at the dinner table. The son asks his father, "Dad, how many kinds of boobs are there?

The father, surprised, answers, "Well, son, there are three kinds of breasts. In her 20s, a woman's breasts are like melons, round and firm. In her 30s to 40s, they are like pears, still nice but hanging a bit. After 50, they are like onions".

"Onions?"

"Yes, you see them and they make you cry."

This infuriated his wife and daughter so the daughter said, "Mum, how many kinds of 'willies' are there?"

The mother, surprised, smiles and answers, "Well dear, a man goes through three phases. In his 20s, his willy is like an oak tree, mighty and hard. In his 30s and 40s, it is like a birch, flexible but reliable. After his 50s, it is like a Christmas tree".

"A Christmas tree?"

"Yes - dead from the root up and the balls are just for decoration."

Finally !!

2006-12-11T21:14:00.000Z

It's taken me a 3 hours but I can now say that after moving the blog from blogger to the new beta blogger (took us awhile to move because we're a group blog), I've got the blog looking somewhat like it use to. Few new extras, which are kinda cool.

Luna and Daniel, if you have problems, IM me.

Don't know if this is true..

2006-12-11T13:11:00.000Z

Got this in an email today. If this is for real, this guy should be awarded a medal. What do you think???

TO THOSE OF YOU NOT FAMILIAR WITH JOE ARPAIO HE IS THE MARICOPA ARIZONA COUNTY SHERIFF AND HE KEEPS GETTING ELECTED OVER AND OVER. WHY?:

Sheriff Joe Arpaio (in Arizona ) who created the "tent city jail":
He has jail meals down to 40 cents a serving and charges the inmates for them. He stopped smoking and porno magazines in the jails. Took away their weights. Cut off all but "G" movies.
He started chain gangs so the inmates could do free work on county and city projects.
Then he started chain gangs for women so he wouldn't get sued for discrimination.
He took away cable TV until he found out there was a federal court order that required cable TV for jails. So he hooked up the cable TV again only let in the Disney channel and the weather channel.
When asked why the weather channel he replied, so they will know how hot it's gonna be while they are working on my chain gangs.
He cut off coffee since it has zero nutritional value. When the inmates complained, he told them, "This isn't the Ritz/Carlton. If you don't like it, don't come back."
He bought Newt Gingrich' lecture series on videotape that he pipes into the jails. When asked by a reporter if he had any lecture series by a Democrat, he replied that a democratic lecture series might explain why a lot of the inmates were in his jails in the first place.
More on the Arizona Sheriff:
With temperatures being even hotter than usual in Phoenix (116 degrees just set a new record), the Associated Press reports: About 2,000 inmates living in a barbed-wire-surrounded tent encampment at the Maricopa County Jail have been given
permission to strip down to their government-issued pink boxer shorts. On Wednesday, hundreds of men wearing boxers were either curled up on their bunk beds or chatted in the tents, which reached 138 degrees inside the week before.
Many were also swathed in wet, pink towels as sweat collected on their chests and dripped down to their pink socks.
"It feels like we are in a furnace," said James Zanzot, an inmate who has lived in the tents for 1 year. "It's inhumane."
Joe Arpaio, the tough-guy sheriff who created the tent city and long ago started making his prisoners wear pink, and eat bologna sandwiches, is not one bit
sympathetic. He said Wednesday that he told all of the inmates: "It's 120 degrees in Iraq and our soldiers are living in tents too, and they have to wear full battle gear, but they didn't commit any crimes, so shut your damned mouths!"
Way to go, Sheriff! Maybe if all prisons were like this one there would be a lot less crime and/or repeat offenders. Criminals should be punished for their crimes - not live in luxury until it's time for their parole, only to go out and commit another crime so they can get back in to live on taxpayers money and enjoy things taxpayers can't afford to have for themselves.